Hard to believe, but summer is almost over, school is starting soon, and Dance! Show! is already up to the top 10. I blinked, and two months went by, how did that happen?

It’s a shortened season this year, which means that the top 10 haven’t had as many weeks to develop their personas and their skills as in previous years. That’s why it may seem to you (as it does to me) that this is one the weakest top tens in recent memory. Usually when we hit the top 10, there’s already some frontrunners and I feel somewhat confident in ranking them, top to bottom. This year, when I gave it some (SOME – hahaha!) thought, I found it really hard to believe that the people I have near the top are actually the best this season has to offer. There just haven’t been any real standouts for me this season, and as a result, people are voting on sheer popularity of backstory, which is never a good thing.

Not that I will be stopped from ranking them, no, not at all! Here we go!

Cole. Here’s a prime example of how clueless I am this season. Cole has had a few real standout performances, his style is unique, and he’s very charismatic. But he’s also a little intense at times, and not in a good way; also, I find that he is very internal when performing and thus does not always click with his partner. And yet, I feel like he’s both the best man left, and the most popular man left. Am I right? NO IDEA. Side note: his performance last week in Mia’s addiction number was amazing, he was the only one in the entire competition to really transcend the original. So good.

Audrey. I am still suffering from the delusion that Audrey and Tiffany are the same person. In their interviews they are so identical in look and personality that I can barely tell them apart. And yet – when they dance, they are both so, so good. I am putting Audrey above Tiffany only because I think her performances with Matthew, particularly the Travis/Titanic one, has made her stand out more in voters’ minds. But really, they are both great.

Tiffany. See above, re: Audrey. I personally feel that Tiffany is actually better. I think she can really blow this competition apart if she has a good couple of weeks – or, she could total wallflower and vanish from our memories with a whimper. Who can say?

Chehon. Chehon’s last day audition dance in Las Vegas will live forever in my memory, and apparently, in the memories of the American public as well. He’s been doing well in the competition but Mary hit the nail on the head last week when she said he needs to let go more, just be a little freer and not quite so perfectly placed. His dazzling strength and partnering skills are sure to keep him in the mix in the weeks to come. He reminds me a lot of SYTYCD Canada’s Season 3 winner, Denys, so he could go all the way here.

Cyrus. Oh boy, what to say about Cyrus. He’s the weakest dancer left. And yet…so magical when he does his own style, and there is a lot to be said about the way he continues to just throw himself into every dance with abandon and commitment. Of all the dancers, he had the most growing to do, and thus, continues to show the most improvement week to week. That goes a long way with voters, and add to that his great smile and his mind-blowing solos and his positive attitude, and you have one popular guy. In the past, popular guys like this have been voted off in the number five position, so here he is on my list. And yet, Russell won in Season 6 with a very similar backstory and so…anything could happen here. As an aside, the judges were a little down on his performance last week and of course, he’s no Twitch, but I thought he actually did a great job of capturing the character and deserved more praise.

George. I adore George. I’m so happy the judges saved him last week, I thought for sure they would go for Matthew (who seemed like such a genuinely nice guy, and also, would have given them lots of performance choices for the tour with Audrey). I think George is probably the best male dancer left, really, but I can’t put him anywhere near the top of the list because he’s been in the bottom 3 for a couple of weeks now (WHY, AMERICA, WHY?). He and Tiffany had my most favourite Mia number last week and George, in particular, did me proud, I thought he smashed it. I hope he gets a really great number this week (please not ballroom please not ballroom) so everyone can revel in his glory.

Witney. I like Witney fine but I feel like I’m still waiting for her breakout moment. Every week she’s really, really good, and yet unmemorable. I thought she was the best girl last week – I mean, it’s pretty hard to screw up the bench number (that choreography is fabulous), but she did a really good job with the characterization, too. I am guessing that she will be getting ballroom next week (helloooooo, Pasha) and possibly every week after that so the judges can defend having ballroom on this show at all. She seems fairly popular, and with some good performances she might turn out to be the top female. Gah, I have no idea.

Lindsay. I feel as though Lindsay has shown more growth than Witney so far this season. Maybe she’s just had more variety in her draws, and maybe it’s because she has to do twice as much work to make the chemistry happen with the chilly Cole. Also, although I adore her, I thought she was weaker than Witney initially – but now I am not so sure. I think she could really dazzle us with the right all-star partner – and I want to see her go far. Sadly, her past appearances in the bottom 3 have possibly marked her for early elimination. At least she made the top 10, which I felt was the right choice, much as I love love loved Amelia.

Eliana. Eliana is my favourite dancer this season and but I feel like she has not lived up to her potential, which is a fatal problem on reality shows. People like to see growth, change, overcoming adversity. I’m quite anxious to see how she will do with a partner other than Cyrus; I’d love to see her do some contemporary and let her shine in her own style. More than the other girls, though, I feel like her dance life is on the line – she needs a big number next week or she may be in danger.

Will. You could have knocked me over with a feather when Will was ushered into the top 10. I called him in week one to be the first person going home. WTF, America? I just don’t get it. I thought he had a nice spark with Amelia but in general, I find his dancing sloppy and weak; he has neither the power nor the personality of the other boys. He’s like a nice cuddly teddy bear, but what shines on this show is lithe, strong racehorses. There’s very few people in the top 10 that I am passionate about protecting, but Will is the only one who I think actually deserves to be bottom three next week. We’ll see, America, we’ll see.

I’m sure next week’s top 8 ranking will be completely different. I admit, I am absolutely making things up this year. Not that that will stop me at all. No, not at all. See you next week!

This is always the time on So You Think You Can Dance when I start to get impatient for the finale. The Top 4 show is almost anticlimatic – the final four have so much dancing to do that they often get tired and don’t turn in their best work. In fact, I can’t remember the last time I thought one of the “best of the season” dances came from the final four show.

Not that you shouldn’t watch it, or anything. Magic moments are always possible.

So! This past week saw the elimination of (SHOCKER) Caitlynn and Ricky. Actually I did think it was maybe close between Tadd and Ricky, at least I would have, had I not steered America in the right direction via my SuperBlog. In fact, now I’m almost afraid to rank because the power is too awesome. How can I ensure that I will not become corrupted? HOW??

And yet, I do it all for you.

Melanie – Still hanging on to the top spot, although shakily. Sasha is breathing down her neck, nipping at her heels, chomping at the bit. To Melanie’s credit, in both her numbers with Twitch and Tadd, I only basically watched her, and her solo was great. But having another Big Moment in the top 4 show would really help sew it up for her.

Sasha – Sasha is not going down without a fight, and she fought hard this week. Her “wall” number with Kent was perfectly suited to her strengths, and Kent was such a good match for her – I really wonder how amazing she could have been had she not been saddled with Alexander in the first half of the season. I thought her solo was great. We will not mention the waacking. No, we will not.

Marko – He’s an amazing dancer, a sweet guy, and great partner. But I feel as though there’s some sparkle that has been missing these past couple of weeks. In both his routines this week (with Janette, SQUEAL, and Caitlynn), he kind of served as backdrop, and his solo was same-old, same-old. I have to say I am really looking forward to seeing him reunited with Melanie in the final four show – I hope to see some of the old magic return.

Tadd – Still with the crap solos, then with the amazing dances. WHAT? UP? I guess he just isn’t much of a choreographer. I know the judges were lukewarm on the Sonia number with the chandelier that he danced with Ellenore (SQUEAL), but man, I LOVED IT. So unique and exciting and different. I get what Lil C was saying about their movement needing to have more flow, but still, AMAZING. One of my favourites from the season but I doubt it will make the finale because Sonya has done about a million numbers this season.

Also, did anyone else give a big “who?” when Ricky’s all-star partner from last week was announced as Jaimie? It was the first time ever that they’ve had an “all star” on this show that I totally, totally did not remember at all. I just went and looked her up and it turns out she was Hok’s partner, the one who did the famous Hummingbird And Flower routine in Season 3, choreographed by Wade Robson. And yes, she was a super amazing dancer, and I’m embarrassed I forgot about her. But also, I guess she didn’t have quite the personality to stand out as a timeless star of the show. Know what I mean?

I wonder which of all these all stars will be included on the tour – likely they will announce that next week. I personally would recommend taking Twitch, Pasha, Neil, Kent, Lauren Froderman, Chelsie Hightower (if you can get her), Allison, and Ellenore (only because I LOVE HER).

In related all-star news, I absolutely swooned then wept with joy watching Lauren and Kent do the “prom” number on the results show, that Travis choreographed for them last season. It was just SO GOOD. And it left me wondering if I’ve really had any strong, emotional reactions like that this season – at the moment only my delight over the Another One Bites The Dust number comes to mind. I’ve read elsewhere that this season has been weak and forgettable – do you agree? What were your stand out numbers of the season? How do you think this season will stack up against others?

I think that really begs the question (or begs the blog?)…how do the seasons rank in general? I smell next week’s post!

So You Think You Can Dance is down to the top 8 dancers, and this is only the second time I have blogged about it. I hang my head in shame. But, better late than never, I say, so let’s jump in!

First let me say, it is very distracting having the Canadian version running concurrently with the American version. Usually they don’t start the Canadian one until the American one is winding down, and that’s a good thing – even I only have time for so much dance show. I’ve been storing up the Canadian ones but the few that I have seen – I’m up to the point where they choose the top (SPOILER) 22 dancers – make me unhappy. I think Canada has some amazing dancers, especially in ballroom and hip hop, but having the two shows on at the same time only highlights the flaws of the Canadian version, namely: the judges suck. Just had to get that off my chest.

And speaking of judging, what do you think of the guest judges on Dance! Show! America! this year? Kristen Chenowith, Neil Patrick Harris, and Jesse Ferguson are basically my dream dinner guests (along with, of course, Ken Jennings), but it’s hard to take either their positive or negative critiques seriously. I usually fast forward through Nigel’s comments (please, please, give up on the terrible puns, dude, FOR THE LOVE), and also Mary’s screeching (although truthfully, she has toned it down this season – I am not missing the HOT TAMALE TRAIN at all). So normally I would only pay attention to the third judge, and when that third judge is Lil C or Travis (wasn’t he so good?) or Mia, then AWESOME, but when it’s some random celebrity, then I don’t know what.

I say that, but still being the third judge is my dream job and you can BET I would expect people to take me seriously, so, um, guess I should maybe just chill. Neil, Jesse, Kristin – love you, call me!

(Carmen Miranda, I invite you to follow me on Twitter. That is all.)

And before we get to the nitty gritty, just wanted to invite y’all to comment on the state of the choreographers this season. There are so many new faces, I can’t even keep them all straight. Most, I think, have not distinguished themselves as unique or original or interesting – this week’s group number was terrible, I thought, and had me wailing for Mia (has she done some Canadian group numbers? Don’t tell me! Or tell me! Either way! I’m excited!). There’s this one hip-hop guy, the one who did Jess and Clarice’s number from last week that I think is good, and there was this one contemporary guy, also with Clarice and Jess who instead of doing the flowing look-away-far thing did a sharper small movement thing, know that guy? That was cool. The others are meh.

So! On to the dancing! I’m sure it comes as no surprise that I’m heartbroken that Clarice went home last week, but at least she did it with all the grace and cheer I’ve come to expect. She totally got screwed with the Bollywood, BTW – has there been a half-decent Bollywood number since the original Katee/Joshua one way back in, what was that, season 4? I would rather have DISCO on the show again, for Pete’s sake.

As for Mitchell, he is a sweetheart but I did feel he was the weakest of the remaining men (not that that’s an insult, everyone left is great), so I was okay with that one. Although I will mention that again, Broadway is the kiss-of-death style – SO hard to get right. Almost impossible, really, unless your name is Jess.

On to the remaining dancers…let’s rank!

1. Melanie. Everyone loves her. I love her too. She gets the biggest cheers and is the front runner. But her number this week with Pasha was very subtle – it was only Mary’s comments on what made the quality of dancing so good that made me appreciate it, but I still didn’t have an emotional response. I thought Pasha had more of a connection with Caitlynn (nature of the choreography and type of dance, really). So Melanie showed this week that she has no problem pulling in the votes with a so-so dance, and yet, I think if she wants to win she will have to really wow us with something special, and soon. She needs to show that even without Marko, she has the stuff. (Also, personal message to Mel: do not, repeat, DO NOT, break into “funky moves” after your serious 30 second solo is complete. NO.)

2. Marko. I thought his was basically invisible in his number with Chelsea Hightower. Man, do I EVER love Chelsea, and my eyes never left her once. Was there even a guy on stage with her? I watched this number THREE TIMES, and every single time I just could not force myself to look at Marko. Like Melanie, he easily got through based on his overall popularity, but I hope he gets contemporary next week so we can really see him shine. (Also, please give Chelsea her own show.)

3. Sasha. 100% converted to Sasha fan this week. Well, maybe 90%. 85%. Whatever – she was amazing with Twitch, FINALLY given a partner who was her equal in terms of power and strength. This was one of the few numbers where I watched the all-star and competitor evenly – they seemed like they’d been dancing together for years. The number had great, great choreography, was danced just SO well. One of my favourites from this season so far.

4. Jess. Seriously? Seriously. Jess has worked hard to overhaul his image. I still think of him as a little brat, but there is no denying that his solos are magical, and he seems to have won over the American public. His number this week with Kathryn was, frankly, terrible – so awkward, no connection, and Kathryn outshone him all over the freakin’ place. And yet, he beat Ricky, RICKY, in the votes. I do not support or agree with this ranking but at this point, I think it’s quite likely that Jess will pull through to the final four. SERIOUSLY.

5. Caitlynn. I really, realy like Caitlynn. Am I the only one? I totally did not get the judges’ comments this week about how she has “danced young” in the past – do they not remember that chairs number by Stacey Tookey, in which she showed great emotional depth? The Janis Joplin number by Travis in which she conveyed Super Sexy just by walking around? In any case, her number with Pasha was passionate and powerful, and I’m so glad it translated into votes for her. (Aside: Did you know that Melanie LaPatin has a column over on Entertainment Weekly’s website? Her column from last week picked Caitlynn and Pasha’s tango as the top number of the week. It’s well worth the read for her critiques – what an amazing guest judge she would be – and also for a fascinating insider look at what the choreographers do all week.) Anyway, I’d love to see Caitlynn make the top 4 but I don’t think she can beat Melanie and Sasha in either votes or with sympathy from the judges (who, I’d like to point out, are still handling the eliminations – don’t they usually go with straight up America Votes at this time? WTF?).

6. Ricky. I think Ricky should be higher. He has really blossomed these past few weeks and shown growth, which few of the other dancers can claim. He danced with Allison this week and I love her, I think she is just magnetic on the stage, and although it’s true I watched her more than him, I felt his dark presence on the stage and thought he did an excellent job with his character. Now if anyone “dances young,” I’d say it’s Ricky, so I hope he gets something even meatier next week to sink his teeth into. I’d love to see him make top 4, I think he is more versatile than Jess and HOLY MOLEY, his solos are DA BOMB.

7. Tadd. I am so torn about Tadd. I think his solos are pretty crappy and he tends to get votes based more on his personality, his mugging, and his abs than his actual dancing. But his number with Comfort last week? Truly amazing. I re-watched that one more than any other and the detail involved, the sheer number and complexity of the movement, is mind boggling. Not only did Tadd totally hit it, he was bang on with the music, not just going through the motions but actually bringing the swagger. It’s an impressive feat and I’m sure no other male dancer could have done it this season. But still…those solos. And I don’t know, the mugging. I just don’t know. I will say this: I would be very surprised if he makes the top 4. And yet, he seems really popular. Why, hello fence, mind if I just sit here a little while?

8. Jordan. This week I finally understood for the first time all season why the judges think she is a good dancer. Her number with Brandon (BRANDON!!! SO AMAZING!!!) was actually pretty good. I didn’t feel the connection between the two one little bit, but I will say that Jordan’s technique was impressive and she was completely committed. And yet…I don’t know, there is some sort of spark missing when I watch her dance, I don’t get the same emotional pull that I do from the others. And her solos feel generic and repetitive. Given that she was in the bottom two this week even though she danced well and in her own style, I’m guessing she will be in trouble again next week.

Join me next week when we start to talk winner. Also, I will endeavor to actually learn the names of all the new choreographers and chat about them. Choreographers, you’ve been WARNED.

It is time. I can keep quiet no longer. Let us talk…Dance Show.

It feels like a long time since I was this invested in So You Think You Can Dance. The last few seasons have been good, with good dancing, but for some reason I just haven’t felt the passion. This season? I cried when the first people had to go home. CRIED. Can’t even THINK about Missy right now without tearing up.

Don’t feel bad for me though – that’s a GOOD thing. Oh Dance Show, how I have missed you.

Let’s chat about the couples still remaining, shall we?

Top of the Heap

Melanie and Marko: I still can’t believe they matched these two up – talk about power couple. I loved Melanie the minute I saw her and she has not disappointed. Marko is an amazing dancer, an amazing partner, and a sweetheart with a golden backstory – I call him for the eventual win (you heard it here first, kids). If they both don’t make it to the final four I will be very sad indeed.

Caitlynn and Mitchell: Here’s the thing – I never liked either of these two. Caitlynn seemed so generic. Mitchell got the “I’m injured wah wah wah” pass on the first week and I hate that. And yet…they have completely won me over. I adored their samba this week (Jean-Marc, you foxy minx, call me!) and I simply cannot fathom why they ended up in the bottom three. Hopefully America gets its voting ass together OR ELSE. Speaking of which, I hear you can vote online now, is that still just for Americans? Don’t you think that is RATHER COUNTRY-IST, Nigel?

Ashley and Chris: Their jailhouse routine from two weeks ago was my most favourite one to date. I think Ashley is a lovely dancer, but it’s Chris who really impresses me – I think he has shown the most growth of any dancer on this show. He’s exactly the kind of B-boy who will dazzle and amaze us with his charisma and ability to do foreign styles – and then get voted out in sixth place like every other B-boy I Have Loved. I get why they were in the bottom three last week – Sonya, experiment on OTHER COUPLES, please – but if you rewatch their bizarre zombie number, I think you will be impressed with the sharpness and originality of their movement. They both deserve top ten, I hope they make it.

Middle of the Road

Ryan and Ricky: Meh. These two are both pretty good in their own styles but they have yet to find the magic – they haven’t exactly clicked and they haven’t dazzled me, either. Ryan I feel is guilty of Hairography – without her blond tresses flying around, her dancing is only so-so. Ricky is SO great in his own style, but in the other styles – meh. I did like their contemporary routine with the scarf tying them together but they’ll really have to pull something amazing out of the bag next week to impress me.

Clarice and Jess: Clarice is actually my favourite female dancer (and this amid a field of amazing, amazing female dancers). She’s got the snap and the personality. I think she’s kind of getting screwed over by a poor matchup. There’s no question that Jess is simply gorgeous as a dancer – probably the best dancer on the show – but he has a major, major personality problem. He comes off as egotistical and obnoxious and that is never good on a reality show when you need the votes to get by. When they dance apart, they are so bang on it takes my breath away – but when they come together, Jess seems annoyed that he has to deal with another person (“IT’S MY SPOTLIGHT, DAMMIT”) and Clarice seems like she doesn’t trust Jess to catch her/lift her/notice she is also in the number. They need to get it together (ha! pun intended!) to move forward, although I’m sure the judges will protect Jess until at least the top ten (please, please do not screw over Clarice).

All Biology, No Chemistry

Jordan and Tadd: I really, really, do not like Jordan. She’s a one-trick pony and if she makes any more Sexy Faces during her numbers, I am going to have to punch her. I think she is a sub-par dancer and has not shown either versatility or flexibility. Tadd – now I have to admit, I am not objective. He’s my cougar-dancer for the season – last week when he danced mostly shirtless I…basically did not notice anything else about the number. I think he’s so charismatic and there’s a chance he could really shine with a different partner (CLARICE, I’m just saying).

Sasha and Alexander: I really, really, do not like Alexander. He seems perfectly nice and his technique is of the highest quality. But he is such a wet noodle on stage – no personality at all. He’s just blandness personified. Sasha is also not one of my favourites, for the opposite reason. She has no sense of humour, and attacks every number like it is LIFE OR DEATH. If she chews any more scenery, she’ll surely bloat up like a balloon. Sasha might work if given a powerful, passionate partner (although I really can’t imagine who – maybe Marko is the only contender), but Alexander isn’t ever going to do any of the ladies any favours. They aren’t working, and it’s not good.

I admit I am concerned that two of the three I picked as the top couples have been in the bottom three…while both of my bottommost couples have been given the full pass free ride. It’s very worrisome, America – I’m counting on you now, do not let me down. I’d like to see Jordan and Alexander go home this week, so make it happen.

See you next week!

I like to play a game during Dance! Show! results show, and that’s Guess The Opening Number Choreographer. I think I have been watching dance show for too long now, since I almost always get it right. This week, angels + Sting = Mia, no doubt about it. And saaaaay whaaat…NAILED IT.

But my enjoyment of the piece was totally ruined when I realized it was Ade playing Centre Angel. No other all stars were dancing, and I really doubted that Mia looked at her six-men-two-women ratio and thought to herself, “You know what this thing needs? One more guy!”

So, yeah, I guessed about Alex. So heartbreaking. I really think he could have won this season. I’m not sure what will happen next year – I kind of feel like this was his chance, and now it’s over, and that’s it. So we’ll see if he even bothers to come back for yet another season. I must say, my interest in this season has taken a sudden nose dive. Not that I’ll stop watching or anything, though.

Seven remain…there can be only one! Let’s rank!

1. ALEX FOREVER. Just kidding.

1. Lauren. Okay, even I am skeptical about this one. Can a woman really win in this Season Of Men? Still, Lauren had such an amazing week. She rocked it with Pasha; her number with Kent was my favourite of the week. She’s growing all the time, which is fabulous for this show – America loves growth. Can she actually pull off the votes? Maybe…and I kind of hope so.

2. Kent. Kent also had a good week, holding his own quite well with Comfort (heavens, the best and possibly only reason to have this whole stupid all stars season is that we get to see Comfort do hip-hop like, 10 times over), and clicking with Lauren. But Kent’s problem seems to be that he is stalling at a certain level – he started out well, he’s still doing well, but he’s not producing either a) growth or b) mind-blowing moments like Alex’s dance with Twitch last week. I’m not sure what he can do differently, but his story arc is stagnating and that’s not good.

3. Jose. Jose was not that great this week. I liked him okay with all star Lauren (Lauren! Good for a second week in a row! What’s come over me?), but he didn’t quite make it good with Billy. SUCH an insult to the Cheesman. Don’t take it personally, Sean! We still love you! Anyway, I have to say that after weeks of weak dancing, Jose still manages to avoid the bottom three every time, so…I guess America loves him. A lot. And you know what’s weird? I kind of do, too. I totally get what the judges mean when they say he has heart and modesty and joy in his dancing, and it just makes you enjoy his performances without worrying about the technicalities. I would be disappointed if he won, but I don’t mind him sticking around for a while, even at the expense of (technically) better dancers.

4. Adechike. I find it really hard to get a read on how America feels about Adechike. On one hand, the judges are always really harsh on him and he seems like a second-tier dancer. On the other, even after a week of ho-hum dancing and severe criticism, he still gets the votes. So, are we looking at the love of a few dedicated voters that will carry him through to top-4 only, or a massive affection for the underdog from all of America that will take him right to the top? I need to see my bookie. In other news, what was up with that gold dress on Courtney this week? I have seen uglier. ON PIGS.

5. Robert. Avoids the bottom two even when given the dreaded quickstep, and even though he and Kathryn had a few missteps during their Barbie and Ken program. I didn’t feel the chemistry between him and Kathryn or him and Ashley, and yet, this is the one week he doesn’t get punished for it. America, you are one fickle lady. Despite his bad week and sometimes annoying personality, I do think Robert is an amazing dancer and does not deserve to go home any time soon. So hopefully this is a turning point for him, and he’ll be moving up the charts next week.

6. Ashley. I’d love to put her at the bottom, but despite landing in the bottom two this week, I’m still not convinced that America is listening to me. She was fine in her hip-hop this week, but frankly, I couldn’t really concentrate on her dancing because WHAT UP WITH THOSE PANTS? Seriously, she looked like she’d had a giant poop. Do ninjas really dress like that? Or hip-hop dancers, for that matter? Wardrobe FAIL. Anyway, as expected her solo on results night was generic and forgettable, and she was basically wallpaper during her number with Robert, so in short, she is still not my favourite. If she ends up in the bottom three with two boys, though, it’s a boy who will be going home for sure, so she’s likely be safe for yet another week, at least.

7. Billy. Most likely to go home this week – he keeps landing at the bottom by votes, and his solos are still kind of confounding and busy and all over the place. His Broadway number to Macavity from Cats was actually my second favourite of the entire week – I thought he really held his own and rocked the house. Plus I love that song. Plus, I squealed like a child given a bowl of ice cream when I saw Katy – did you? Sir Monkeypants was all, “It’s a dance show,” and I was all, “KATY KATY KATY BOING BOING BOING.” Seriously, I need medical help. Anyway, as I said above, his number with Jose was just awful. They both looked so uncomfortable dancing together – it was beyond lack of chemistry and into I-don’t-like-you-dude. He just doesn’t seem to be finding a niche with the viewers. If he gets ballroom next week – which he is way overdue for – he’s a goner. So sad! Billy is a sweetie.

I must add that I am loving the all star matchups they are popping into the results show, by the way. So far we’ve seen Mark and Courtney, and Pasha and Anya. Who is left to be showcased? Obviously they should get Twitch and Comfort to do their robot number to “Forever” which is sheer legend. Neil and Lauren were original partners back in Season 3, so they probably have a couple of routines they could do – one by Wade Robson in which Neil is a vampire chasing Lauren in a white dress stands out. That leaves Ade, Dominic, Kathryn, and Allison/Katy, all of whom are from different seasons. Who do you think should dance with whom? And would you like to see them do original numbers, or have one of the all stars fill in a missing part – Allison with Ade on the breast cancer number, say, or Dominic taking one of Legacy’s roles in one of his fantastic numbers with Kathryn? Actually, I think I just answered my own question – bring it, Dance Show!

So, I don’t usually start blogging about Dance! Show! until we hit the top 10…well, maybe the top 12. Or top 14. Whatever.

This season is throwing me off though, so I have to talk it out. First of all, All Stars: good or bad? Discuss.

My own feeling so far is extremely mixed. On one hand, I squealed with excitment to see the likes of Mark and Kathryn back on the stage. On the other hand, don’t you think the thrill of seeing our old favourites is taking away from excitement and investment in the new dancers?

And on one hand, I think having an “expert” at each style in each number will create higher caliber performances, especially in the early weeks (did you SEE Comfort snapping it out? She was so awesome!). On the other hand, I will really miss seeing the chemistry bloom between certain couples that are given the chance to dance together week after week. I used to get so invested in the relationships between the couples — you could just see who had “it’ and who didn’t — and now, with a new partner every week, I think it will be very hit-or-miss as to who is good on any given week. It’ll just be so much harder for the new dancers to showcase their growth and development, and I fear they will constantly live in the shadow of the All Stars.

Hm.

Anyway, this week was our first chance to see it all in action, and it did seem to me that for a first week, the dancing was much better than average, so that’s a plus. Here’s how I’d rank the competing dancers.

1. Alex. Whenever I have an early favourite, one of two things is going to happen: they’re going to get voted off in the first two weeks, or they’re going to win. Since Alex is still around, I’m going to call him for the win. He’s SUCH an amazing dancer, and his number this week with Allison was just incredible. Plus, he seems to have genuinue modesty, charm, and a great back story. He’s the whole package. Can’t wait to see him hip hop – will it be good for a laugh, good for a thrill, or both?

2. Richard. Although he received no coverage at all during Vegas week (when Shankman was telling him he’d made the top 10, I was all, “Who the hell is that guy standing with Billy?”), Richard is a textbook example of how to make your mark on America super fast. He cracked some jokes in his 10-second first week interview that established his persona as “the wacky guy.” He found a touching story for this week so we could identify with his fondness for his father and his childhood dreams coming true. He showed plenty of personality when working with his choreographer (THE CHEESEMAN, LOVE LOVE LOVE), and I think he was the only new dancer who actually out-danced his All Star partner. He’ll go far.

3. Jose. America loves a B-Boy. America loves an untrained dancer who can grow every week, and continue to surprise and impress us. But America only loves a breaker so far. Jose is so cute and talented, but I predict he’ll follow in the footsteps of Legacy, Gev, and Dominic, and only last until the just before the top four. I still put him at number 3, though. I guess I deserved that “C” I got in Grade 4 Math.

4. Adechike. I thought the judges were unfairly harsh on Adechicke this week. His number with Kathryn was great — and some might say that was mostly due to Kathryn, who kind of stole the show. But Adechike was still impressive, and I think he will suprise us in the weeks to come. He seems so fragile, and hurt by the judges’ comments, that I think the voting public will rush to his side and protect him. Could he ride the mothering/sympathy wave all the way to the final? Russell did it last year, so…possibly yes.

5. Lauren. It’s a man’s world this season, and really, all the boys are much better than the girls. I think Lauren is the only one who shows potential, but MAN, does she ever need to learn to dance without a smile plastered on her face. Even an upbeat, happy number should show some range of emotion. I think she’s young, and she needs to grow up very, very fast if she’s going to dance with the big boys this season. Having the likes of Allison and Kathryn on the show is not doing her any favours, either.

6. Kent. I feel like the producers are trying to shove Kent down my throat, and I’m gagging. If we have to hear about his rural town ONE MORE TIME, NIGEL, I’m starting an I-hate-Ohio website. (It is Ohio, isn’t it? Whatever.) Kent himself is cute but so, so young, and his dancing this week with Anya was just awful – I felt kind of ashamed and dirty watching it. I feel like he’s got the goods in his own style, but if he doesn’t pick it up in the other styles, and, like Lauren, grow up really fast, he’s in trouble.

7. Cristina. I quite like Cristina. For some reason, I feel like her personality does not translate well to television – she seems a little ditzy but I don’t think that is really true. She’s got the moves, that’s for sure; she really wants this; and she’s worked really hard to be here. I’m worried about her landing in the bottom three this week – hers was a weaker number, but I didn’t think it was one of the worst three, really. I hope she can really wow us next week and stick around a while.

8. Billy. When Billy did his solo during Vegas week, I thought no one would be able to touch him. And yet, on the show so far I have been completely unimpressed. He is really, really young looking, which works against him — he suffers from Leonardo Di Caprio syndrome. I know I’m going to find it hard to buy him in a heavily dramatic piece – can you imagine him in one of Mia’s numbers, or doing what Alex did this week with his Sonya piece? I’m sure I’m not alone when I say, NO. Billy is a lovely dancer but I’m really not sure if there is anything he can do to succeed on this show — he is who he is, and trying to totally transform himself in just a couple of weeks is going to feel false. He’d really have to dazzle me next week to get any kind of support (and we all know it’s MY word that makes or breaks a dancer on this show!).

9. Melinda. Unlike the other girls, Melinda has the maturity and showmanship to rock it. What she is lacking is the technical skills, and this week, it really showed. Pasha is a strong (and HUNKY) partner, but she just did not have the snap or energy to keep up with him. I agree with the judges that she needs to show more warmth, and she needs to work on connecting with her partner – I’m sure she is more used to alternating tap solos than trying to work directly with another dancer. And, she needs to practice the hell out of every number so she doesn’t look as though she’s thinking so hard.

10. Ashley. I am not a fan of Ashley. We saw nothing of her during Vegas week, and given a very, very small window in which to introduce herself she gives us…funny robot voice. Holy cow, woman. Have you no dreams? No inspirational family? No life goals? No interesting hobbies? No past illnesses to milk? Give us SOMETHING. I see Ashley as being a mere clone of Lauren, only with even less personality. I did not like her number with Neil this week — I thought it was generic, forgettable, and I felt nothing at all from her — and why she did not end up eliminated (not even in the bottom three!) I do not understand.

Also, just let me add how sad I am that Alexie was eliminated. She actually managed to surprise me — she looks so small and slight, but when she dances, she PUNCHES IT. She’s got the snap, I thought she rocked it with Twitch, and I think she could have been great. Plus, more clips of Shankman on Star Search would make me a very, very, very happy woman. Oh my goodness, wasn’t his Blue Steel SO FABULOUS? Shankman, darling, call me!

* Many thanks to Julie for that kick-ass title.

So. Dance! Show! is all over for another few months and I have the usual burn out. I think what happens, after the finale, is that a huge chunk of my brain that was very busy keeping track of all things Dance Show at all times suddenly has nothing to do, and it’s like a physical withdrawal. I get all bitchy and cranky. Or maybe that’s just PMS.

Also, I always seem to declare the latest season as being the worst ever, and again, I find I was not as engrossed this season as I have been in the past. Of course, that could be because I watched most of the episodes in super-fast-forward with Little Miss Sunshine whining beside me that she waaaaants to waaaaatch Toooopy!

Proposed: Dance! Show! has jumped the shark due to the loss of critical choreographers and the lack of remaining mature talent in America to tap, and thus will never again see the heights that were Seasons 2, 3, and 4. Discuss.

In the meantime, let’s break down Season 6, shall we?

The Good

The best thing about this season was the addition of the specialty show — the extra episode in which each set of dancers got to do a number in their specialty. There’s no question that this show was specifically added so that tap dancing could be profiled on the show — Nigel makes no attempt to hide his affection for tap. Still, I hope they keep this format, because it led to some of the best numbers of the entire season (witness half of this program being re-shown in the finale).

Also good: the addition of Adam Shankman as a permanent judge. I thought I would miss the various guest judges, but Shankman really did me proud this season, offering up meaningful and hilarious commentary. In fact, dare I say that he has become the most relevant judge on the panel? I hope he’ll stick around for next season as well. The only real drawback is that we don’t get to see any of his fantastic choreography while he’s sitting at the judges’ table.

In other good news, I really enjoyed most of the group numbers this season. In the past couple of seasons they’ve been kind of hit-or-miss for me, but this year there were several I really loved. Of course, Wade Robson’s Top 20 number — the dance-off to the fantastic song Comanche — is my favourite group number of all time. So if nothing else, there’s the beauty of Wade.

The Bad

I’m sure it comes as no surprise that I’m a little disappointed in the winner. I don’t think I’ve ever felt so strongly about who should win the show — usually by the time the top 4 roll around, I have a personal favourite but would be happy to see any of them take the title. This year, though, I was on Team Jakob all the way. He was seriously a cut above every else this season — and possibly ever, the only person I think who could match him for talent is Season 3’s Danny — and he deserved to win. I hope he goes on to have a fabulous dancing career, because I’d totally pay to see him on Broadway or in his own show or wherever.

It’s funny, but way back in Season 2 there was a similar showdown between Benji and Travis (Travis Wall, now a choreographer on the show). Travis was the more skilled dancer but Benji, who was a ballroom dancer, had this amazing charisma and made every number he ever danced into something fun and powerful. Back then, although I recognized Travis as being the better dancer (and lordy, the judges were totally cramming him down the throats of the voting public with their effusive praise), I really wanted Benji to win (and he did). This season, my sympathies were totally reversed. Interesting.

The Ugly

Oh my heavens. That finale SUCKED.

First of all, THREE musical guests? And TWO numbers by J.Lo? I understand that this is Prime Time and you have to goose the ratings however you can. But it is Dance! Show! after all! All that craptastic singing left precious little time for, you know, DANCING. Traditionally the finale is my favourite episode of the season, because all my favourite numbers get repeated and I just swoon and swoon over the glory of the movement. This time there were, what, like six numbers?

And almost half of them were just the pre-taped version?

And like, 80% were either from the specialty show, or the Top 6 show that had aired just the very night before?

SUCKS.

Speaking of the penultimate episode, I felt there were few standouts. The best part of the whole show was when Ashleigh danced with Ryan (mushy contemporary, I totally called it!). I thought they were actually pretty good — it was maybe the best I’d ever seen Ryan dance a non-ballroom number — and I liked it fine. But the judges! They were so hilariously careful in their comments. They didn’t want to say that it was terrible, so it was all softball crap like, “You’ll always remember this special night,” and “What a wonderful moment for you,” and “That must have felt so wonderful for you.” The whole undertone was, “We’re so glad it was good FOR YOU, because it was rotten for us!” Poor poor married couple.

And to add insult to injury, they even had them throw together a last-minute jive for the finale because, apparently, their professionally choreographed number was just TOO GROSS to repeat air. Seriously, Nigel, was it that awful?

Overall, I do feel that this season was low on the big numbers, the ones that will live on in memory, but here are a few of my favourites that I wish they had found time for:

• Karen and Kevin hip hop to Ice Cream Paint Job, where Kevin is the mechanic and Karen his muse, by Taboleon, Week 2
• Ellenore and Ryan tango by Miriam and Leonardo, Week 2
• Mollee and Nathan Bollywood routine, by Nakul, Week 2 (shown in the finale)
• Ashleigh and Jakob jazz routine to Relax, with the cane prop, by Mandy Moore, Week 3
• Noelle and Russell african jazz (shown in the finale), by THE CHEESEMAN (so awesome!), Week 3
• Channing and Victor blackbird number (with the birdcage), by Tyce Diorio, Week 4
• Kathryn and Legacy jazz with Sonya from week 5 – this is the one where they wore the red costumes and Legacy entered with a crab walk and it was SO COOL
• Mollee and Jakob Broadway routine to Easy Street from Annie, by Joey FREAKING Dowling, in Week 8
• Ellenore and Legacy contemporary routine to Machine Gun, with the table prop, by Travis Wall (shown in the finale)
• Kathryn and Ryan samba from the top 6 show, by Jason Gilkison — this was practically the only ballroom number from the season that I thought was truly outstanding, and I hope we see a lot more of Jason next season

And that’s a wrap! See you in the summer.

This is it! The Dance! Show! finale is coming early this year, like a special Christmas gift that arrives in the mail from your super organized faraway aunt. Six dancers left, and just one show to decide their fate. Who will win?

You KNOW that there’s going to be pain if America messes this one up. I can’t remember the last time I cared so much about the overall winner. BE GOOD, America. Santa is watching you!

Here’s my final rankings of the remaining six.

1. Russell. His Santa solo this past week was SO CUTE. He’s just such a squisher. However, he is not the best dancer. I suppose there is a reason that they call the winner “America’s Most POPULAR Dancer” instead of “America’s Best Dancer,” but just one time, ONE TIME, could we vote for the dancer who is actually the best? As a present for me? Russell is cute, but please consider…

2. Jakob. Oh my, do I ever love Jakob. He is not only incredibly talented and a great actor, but he’s the rare dancer who can elevate his partners to greatness. Last week he showed that Ellenore was capable of connecting with a partner and she looked amazing. This week, he turned Mollee into magic. Watch his numbers with Mollee — you’ll see he is constantly looking at her, to make sure that he’s completely in sync with her at all times. That’s generosity; that’s a dancer who cares more about the overall performance and the audience’s experience than himself. And, he even made a Joey Dowling Broadway number into something great. JOEY DOWLING. GREAT. If that isn’t sheer dancing brilliance, I don’t know what is.

3. Kathryn. What up, America? Last week she’s in the bottom two, this week, the Safest of the Safe. I don’t get it. All I know is, I like her a lot, and like Jakob, I think she manages to click with every partner she’s given (except perhaps Nathan). This coming week she’ll be Jakob’s partner, so I expect WOW BAM SHAZAM from these two.

4. Ellenore. This week, I felt she was back in the mode of fantastic dancing, weak partner chemistry. I don’t know what it is about her — I love her solos, but she just doesn’t seem good at the pair-dancing thing. This week she should be paired with Russell, who I also think lacks chemistry with a lot of his partners, so I’m worried for her. Still love her, though.

5. Ashleigh. I like Ashleigh, and I really like her dancing. But you KNOW how I feel about free passes given to dancers who are injured — NO. At least she was included in the voting process, and not given a total free pass like Noelle earlier this season, and I did really appreciate the way she came on stage and talked about how eager and willing she was to get out there and how it was killing her to have the doctors bench her. Also, the footage of her dress rehearsal showed that she was ready and on point before the shoulder thing. STILL. I thought Mollee was just brilliant this past week (did I mention the Joey Dowling? And how it was actually GREAT?) and she totally deserved to stay. That makes Ashleigh the lowest ranked woman in my book.

6. Ryan. Dudes, how many times do I have to rank this guy last before you start listening to me? He’s a great partner for the women but he’s so stiff at non-ballroom styles. His solos are lame and he does not have the sparkle of Legacy (HUGE mistake, America). However, keeping him around does set him up for the Ryan-Ashleigh pairing, and I expect lots of super romantic numbers for them (a Samba or a Waltz, perhaps, along with a Contemporary piece in which they can spend the whole song staring into each others’ eyes). So they both might end up moving ahead of some of the other dancers. But that would be wrong.

Is there another Dance! Show! season coming in January? Or will we have to wait until summer again? Just wondering so I can warn Sir Monkeypants — he likes to be prepared for the onslaught.

See you at the finale!

Well well well! What a difference a week makes. Many couples struggled to find chemistry with their new partners this week, leading to some major shake ups in the top 8 handicapping.

1. Jakob. No surprise that he totally rocked this week — if anything, he was even better with Ellenore than Ashleigh. Jakob is an amazing dancer, and yet seems to lack the arrogance of Season 3 Danny and the blandness of Season 5 Brandon. Could this be the rare season when the actual best dancer takes the trophy? The screaming girls in the front row say, “YES.”

2. Russell. Second only to Jakob in girl-screams, Russell confirmed his status with the fans and the judges this week. I have to admit I really liked him a lot with Mollee, and felt they had by far the best chemistry of any of the new couples. I totally agree with Nigel — had they been paired from the start, it could have made a big difference to both of them. As it is, his solos are fantastic, the people love him, and he’s a sweetie pie — a recipe for triumph.

3. Ellenore. How silly of me to think the people did not love her as I love her! She was great this week with Jakob. Since she’s unlikely to be paired with Ryan again, she’ll be with either Russell or Legacy this week — both good omens for her status.

4. Legacy. I still think the people love Legacy…but it certainly was a shock to see him standing with Nathan in contention for one of the bottom two slots. Perhaps that jolt will motivate the voting public to support him. Perhaps he’ll be just like Season 3 Dominic — super popular, but going out in fifth/sixth spot, just shy of the top four (as do all my favourite dancers, it seems). In any case, he was not that great this week, although I didn’t really like his choreographers, so next week I think he has a good chance of rebounding.

5. Mollee. Mollee really did what she needed to do this week — break free of her cutsy-cutsy partnership with Nathan and do some serious dancing with a serious partner. She’s still on probation but her quick bump to safety on results show night does bode well for her, if she can keep the good dancing coming.

6. Ashleigh. Again, some love her, some hate her, but DAMN, what a good back story. I totally skipped over most of the backstory montages (snooze!) but I was glued to the screen for any news of Ashleigh’s history. At last, some juicy info about her “illness” and a whole “triumph over adversity” story that brings a tear to the eye. She could really work it if she dances well and gives some warmer interviews.

7. Kathryn. Oh, how it saddens me to see Kathryn down here. Love her, love her dancing, but being paired with Nathan did her no favours. Let’s hope she pulls Jakob this week and really blows our socks off, or — oh dear, I don’t even like to think about it. In fact, let’s analyse the remaining couples:

Jakob must be with Kathryn or Mollee (to avoid past partnerships)
Russell must be with anyone but Mollee
Legacy must be with Ellenore or Mollee
Ryan must be with anyone but Ellenore, and I don’t think they will put him with Ashleigh, more because they are the same style than because they are husband and wife.

So I’m going to predict:
Jakob with Kathryn (only because I really HOPE for this matchup)
Russell with Ashleigh
Legacy with Ellenore
Ryan with Mollee (warning: MISMATCH.)

Hm. I am absolutely terrible at predicting the couples like this, and looking this list over, I have to admit, poor Kathryn will probably be put with Ryan, in order to avoid the dreadful horror of the Ryan/Mollee pairing. (Don’t let the “pull names out of a hat” garbage fool you. There’s a very small subset of names in that hat available to be pulled, I know it.)

8. Ryan. Definitely the weakest man left, and likely the least popular — he’s a sure bet to go home this week unless he really pulls a rabbit out of a hat.

In other news, did you see The Legion of Extraordinary Dancers on the results show last week? That was so awesome, I’m going to have to get all street on you and say it was SICK. My love knows no bounds. You want to go to there!