Little Miss Sunshine and I have been spending a lot of quality time with the Backstreet Boys on YouTube lately. She is into it. Nick is her favourite, and she doesn’t seem perturbed at all that he is now 32 years old.

(I am perturbed. Very perturbed.)

All this was prompted by Entertainment Weekly’s recent proclamation that “I Want It That Way” is the best boy-band hit ever:

After that, I had it stuck in my head for days and days. I couldn’t get it out, so I thought that bombarding my brain with it would help flush it out. And yet, it only makes it more addictive. Why is that?

Now, the Little Miss and I like that song fo’ shizzle, but both of us feel that “As Long As You Love Me” is the better song and the better video. Discuss.

Or, would you go with the dark horse “All I Have To Give”? It’s my personal favourite. Don’t tell anyone.

I’m thinking that the amount of brain cells I have spent on this merits a masters dissertation, at the very least. Possibly a Ph.D. The Little Miss can be the youngest Ph.D. in the world!

I’m a parenting genius.

It’s Easter Saturday – that’s a thing, isn’t it? – and my entire family is coming for dinner tonight. That’s twenty people, counting my youngest sister’s unborn child, which I totally get to count, because SQEEE, unborn baby!

Yesterday I spent most of the day making five different kinds of pie. This was my whole goal of having the Year Of Pie – to be able to make pies for large family gatherings, because seriously, can you even call it a family gathering if there is no pie?

Anyway, I’m past the point of having to swear and totally stress out at the making of the pies, but even so, you have to really, really love pie to invest a whole day in making them. Because besides all the finicky work involved, there’s bonus events like when you turn on the stove to bake your pies, but forget it is full of gluten-free waffles you lovingly handmade for your son that morning, and by the time you start to wonder what that smokey smell is, you’ve got six black Belgian waffles burning in the oven.

And if things really go well, you can yell at your husband to come and HELP YOU, and then grab smoking hot black waffles one by one out of the oven and fling them at him, as he tries to catch them in a bowl. Sir Monkeypants now has a new kitchen rule: no throwing burning things at other people who are trying to help you. I think he’s having it put on a sampler.

Another bonus! You may turn off the oven in your mad frenzy to deal with the waffles, then later put your pies in the “hot” oven, only to find them mildly lukewarm an hour and a half later. Whoops!

And once you do remember to turn on the oven, if you’re really, really lucky, your strawberry pie might bubble over and cause a huge spill in the bottom of the oven that creates enough smoke to mimic a forest fire, and which will have you on your hands and knees scrubbing the inside of the oven at 7 a.m. the next morning, because nothing says Yummy Turkey like the smell of burnt strawberries, unless it’s the smell of oven cleaner, am I right?

So needless to say, I REALLY like pie.

I still have about 50 dishes left to make so I best get cracking. Is it too late to have pie and cereal for dinner?

Oh hi, Earth! You know, we never get together anymore since I dropped off the face of you. We should totes get coffee. Meet you at Starbucks?

(The short explanation: I have a new job! It’s a work-from-home situation. Still working out the kinks of how to, you know, work, parent, run my design business and blog all at the same time. That fourth arm should be arriving in the mail any day now!)

In the meantime, I have managed to book Blog Out Loud. Oh yes! It’ll be on Thursday, June 14, at 7 p.m., at the Arrow and Loon downtown. Which has the free Why-Fies. I am totes on top of things.

(You can read more about BOLO here.)

Last night I was heading to bed when I heard the Captain calling out from his room. I went in and he was saying, “Mom, mom!” over and over – it was clear he was not actually awake but having a nightmare.

I said, “Are you okay, honey?”

He said, “I am, I just can’t find you!”

I went to the bed and took his hand. I said, “I’m right here. Go back to sleep and I’ll sit right here beside you for as long as it takes.”

He sighed and smiled, rolled over and went back to sleep.

I still got it.

This morning he woke up with a fever above 40 degrees – day four of this bug he is fighting. This means day four of us snuggled up in bed watching a Clone Wars marathon. Good times.

————————————

The other day Little Miss Sunshine (who is four AND A HALF now, thank you very much) came downstairs to the kitchen in a new outfit. I asked her when she had gotten so tall. She told me it was because she had eaten the “good growing food” (which is what we call non-treat food around here). I beamed – she was listening! Lessons were being learned!

Then she said, “You should know, you MADE ME eat it.”

Yeah, I still got it.

But first, a small rant:

Last week we were down in Southern Ontario visiting the grandparents, and I rather cavalierly didn’t pack too much food. I took some snacks and things, but mostly I thought I’d be able to get what we needed there. Because the people of Southern Ontario eat, right? They have access to food, somehow? Yes?

But I was surprised to find very few options for the Captain to eat. We hit up several grocery stores and they’d have rice milk, maybe, and one kind of gluten free pasta, if we were lucky, and one store had a small selection of Bob’s Red Mill gluten-free flours in the cereal aisle. That was IT.

Here in Kanata I live within a fifteen minute drive of not one, but two dedicated alternative food grocery stores – the Natural Food Pantry and the Rainbow Foods (shout out to both, you are AWESOME). My closest grocery store, the Superstore, has two whole aisles devoted to alternative/gluten free/allergy-focused foods and I can actually get at least half of the food I need for the Captain on my regular grocery run. Nearby there’s a Farm Boy, which is a smaller grocery store chain here in town – they have a row of gluten-free stuff and they also stock a line of local, fresh-baked breads and treats that are gluten, egg, milk, and nut free (AND tasty, you people are AMAZING). Right next door to the Farm Boy is the Bulk Barn, which is my number one stop for alternative flours of all kinds, as well as the corn pasta the Captain loves and plenty of other alternative treats and snacks. Oh, and in the rare instance I can’t find what I need at any of these FIVE stores, there’s the giant Loblaws in Barrhaven, still within a 15 minute drive, which stocks not only a lot of unusual gluten free foods, but has a huge selection of organic/chemical free toiletries.

So you can see why I kind of thought that access to foods like this was kind of…common. I am now so incredibly grateful to live where I live. I’m not sure if food allergies are just more common in the Ottawa area, or if we just have more enterprising entrepreneurs, or if we’re just more aware, or what, but in Cambrige and Mississauga at least, you can’t just wander into a grocery store and pick up some millet flour, corn pasta, and Enjoy Life cookies. No siree.

I admit I got a little sad and weepy while we were away because despite my son’s super restrictive diet, I never have to think of him as being really different from other kids, because food that’s safe for him is so widely available here. In Southern Ontario was the first time I ever thought of him as being really high maintenance, special needs, different. And it was tough.

But now we are home, all is well, and I’m putting it behind me.

Anyway! End rant. Moving on.

I get asked all the time what kind of treats the Captain can eat. It was his birthday this week and we had a very small gathering at the house and trust me, there was no lack of sugar.

Here’s what we served:

Gluten Free Cupcakes, as described in this post.

Krispie Squares:

These are made from Koala Crisp Cereal which are chocolate flavoured and make THE BEST treat squares ever. The Captain’s class went NUTS for them. Speaking of nuts, Koala Crisps are a may-contain product for peanuts/nuts but the Captain, who is super sensitive, is fine with them. You can just substitute canola oil for the melted butter and I use no-name brand marshmallows.

Corn Twists:

These contain “vegetable oil” which sometimes means soy. But the Captain is fine with them. They are like bits of salty air. Yet SO ADDICTIVE.

Plain Flavour Pringles:

Actually most plain flavour chips are fine for him but Pringles are our This Is A Special Event treat food.

Ice Cream Sundaes:

The Captain had Rice Dream vanilla ice cream. I have an ice cream maker and I have some good “alternative” type recipes he likes but frankly, the Rice Dream is better. The other kids had regular milk-based ice cream. I put out bowls of coloured mini marshmallows, various kinds of sprinkles, strawberries, and Enjoy Life brand mini chocolate chips. The non-allergic got to have spray-on whipped cream, if desired. This was a last minute idea of mine; next time if I am better prepared I will make up some Captain-safe chocolate sauce.

Cream Soda:

Man, do I ever hate pop. I think it’s really one of the worst foods on the planet. But in the last few months we’ve allowed it to creep into the Captain’s diet as a treat food. It’s safe for him, and it’s widely available, so when the girls are in a situation where they are having (say) ice cream or donuts or chocolate bars, the Captain gets to have pop. Cream Soda is his favourite and since it’s caffeine free, I can look the other way when he drinks it on special occasions. We always buy Fanta, it’s da bomb according to the Captain. Did you know Fanta is only available in Canada? That makes it EXTRA special.

Man, that really sounds like a lot of crap, doesn’t it? We also had fruit! There was fruit available! No one ate any, but it was there, on the table. So that TOTALLY COUNTS.

Last week we had a scheduling conflict, and since Sir Monkeypants and I were going to be out at different times, it was hard to get a sitter as no one would be able to drive her home. So instead, I asked Fame Throwa to come over and babysit, and to say thank you, I baked her some mini pies.

It’s been a while since I made a pie – now that my Year Of Pie is over, I’m only making one about once a month or maybe even once every six weeks. But I’m impressed at how easy it has gotten, I almost never swear anymore. Well, MOSTLY.

While we were in Florida we took one afternoon to go outlet shopping, which I believe is a requirement of vacationing. I think Sir Monkeypants was pretty excited at the idea that I might actually buy some new clothes, and then he could be seen out and about with a nice lady who was not wearing a solid-coloured scoop-neck t-shirt featuring a salad dressing stain and a small hole in the belly.

But of course, instead of buying clothes I bought pie plates. Nothing like something heavy and breakable to add to the luggage!

These mini pie plates came from the Le Creuset store, where a cast-iron pot with a lid can run you $350. So mostly I went in to drool, but then these wee plates were on sale, and they were FOR PIE, so it was destiny.

These pies I made for Fame Throwa were two apple, two strawberry, and I hear they were divine, the best I’ve ever made. They certainly were cute. I didn’t end up tasting them at all because my meeting that night ran super late, and Fame Throwa was trapped in our house for hours with a) two password-protected computers, b) two Fitness magazines she had already read, and c) a TV remote that was not working. So basically she sat in silence in my house for five hours and thus, she got ALL THE PIE.

My meeting that night, by the way, was at The Board to talk about moving the grade 7/8 students out of my kids’ school. The Board made it fairly clear that moving the entire area to a 7-12 high school model is the wave of the future, but hopefully they heard our appeals that their current plan for our local students is just insane. It makes no sense to try to repurpose a tiny school full of primary facilities for larger sized students with different needs, who will be trying to use the school at over 150% capacity, when there is no money at all for any kind of refurbishments. Parents from my kids’ school pummelled the Board with presentations on this subject – they’ll be debating our points in a couple of weeks, then making a final decision at the end of April.

GAH, politics, I hate this stuff but in this case it’s necessary. Let’s all make ourselves feel better with pie, shall we?

Quick Update Number One: The root canal went great! I am pain-free and painkiller-free. I’m eating normally and all is well. I am shocked, shocked at how incredibly happy and bubbly and joyful I’ve been around here ever since. Um, sorry for the past four weeks, Turtlehead family. I’m thinking of having all the rest of my teeth done now.

Quick Update Number Two: I was at the WalMart in Kanata today and they still had four of those Princess Castles still for $50. (I know, I know – why do I even bother recycling, when I’m going to blow all that saving the world crap by shopping at WalMart? SIGH.) Anyway, they are way at the back with the seasonal toys, on the bottom shelf. Go get one. If I had any nieces younger than 18 years old, I’d be all over that.

New Business: So this weekend, Gal Smiley and Sir Monkeypants did a small project where they made a CD of all her favourite songs.

(We’ve talked books! We’ve talked movies! Now bring on the music!)

I never really think of the kids as having a taste in music, because after all, these are the children who can listen to the Lazytown soundtrack over and over and over in the van until I feel compelled to drive into a tree. But also, I think they haven’t developed their own sound because they have no control over what they hear. I get to pick what gets played in the van, and Sir Monkeypants or I pick the playlists for our occasional dance parties. I do put on kiddie CDs to please the crowd and I do take requests, but it’s not like they have free reign to just go over and pop in a CD (Good God, is that even a thing anymore? I am SUCH A DINOSAUR).

Anyway, one thing we do know is each kid’s favourite songs, so it was pretty easy for Sir Monkeypants to help Gal Smiley assemble her list for the new CD. I was pretty impressed to find that other than the odd sentimental favourite, she is developing a distinctive sound. She likes rock, lots of guitar and a bit of an alternative sound. She likes Teagan and Sara the best, and also The Killers and the Von Blondies and the Fratellis, and I’d name some other modern type musicians here but that is as far as my “current” musical knowledge goes.

Then Little Miss Sunshine decided she wanted a CD too, and hers is much more of a mishmash, including such infamous titles as Elmo’s Song and Do-Re-Mi from The Sound of Music (Movie List FOR THE WIN, spelled out for you dinosaurs like me). But as I played her certain songs I thought she might enjoy, she showed surprising confidence about what she did and didn’t like. It turns out she likes jangly kind of folky Canadian rock, like Great Big Sea and Spirit of the West and Blue Rodeo. I am so surprised, I had her pegged as a Hannah Montana fan from day one.

Now the Captain wants a CD too, and he wants the first track on his to be Block Rockin’ Beats by The Chemical Brothers, which Sir Monkeypants considers to be a personal triumph of parenting. Looks like we have a little electronica fiend on our hands.

All this with, I have to say, complete and total lack of encouragement on my part. I listen to total crap music and often inflict the worst sort of 70s and 80s soft rock on my poor children’s delicate ears. And I rarely just listen to music around the house, too, it’s all in the car, half-heard songs as we dash from place to place.

And yet, they’re finding their niches. They’re expressing themselves.

It’s like they are…their own people.

Not sure why this should surprise me so much, but it does. It’s a wonder to me that they are turning into little humans who think for themselves, who have their own likes and dislikes, who can express what they want and don’t want.

I love it. I love getting to know them. I can’t wait to learn more.

I forgot to include this cute classic movie story in my last post on this subject. While in Disney, we rode the Great Movie Ride at Hollywood Studios. You sit in a kind of giant car and are driven from room to room, each one meant to immerse you in the set of a famous movie. So one room was Muchkinland from The Wizard of Oz, and another was the snake/temple room from Raiders of the Lost Ark.

One of the rooms featured the movie Alien. Our car was parked inside a metallic-looking tube, with red emergency lights and dry-ice smoke all around, and then the Alien jumps out at you from an overhead opening. During this part of the ride, the girls were plenty scared but the Captain totally FREAKED OUT.

This is going to sound rather Bad Mommy of me, but I was kind of delighted that he was freaking out so much. He’d spent the whole week declaring himself to be unscareable – Pirates of the Carribean and Haunted Mansion were “totally not scary at all, MOM,” and rides like Space Mountain and Tower of Terror were super! fun! and not remotely terrifying. So to see him completely beside himself on the movie ride, where grandmothers go to have a mid-afternoon air conditioned break, was a tiny bit satisfying.

Score one for the movies!

I found this movie list much harder to put together than my book list. I feel like everyone can agree on certain book classics but movies are more all over the place. Movies I saw as a teenager had a huge impact on me and they are possibly, just POSSIBLY, not that great of a movie. So should I put them on my movie list? Or should I keep to the established greats?

Also, I wanted to make a list of family-friendly films, since we are hoping to establish a family movie night, but also, I had a list of really classic movies that were required viewing for Their Movie Education. I also had to admit that some of the classic movies were not appropriate for group viewing. I’ll forever be scarred by the time when I was in high school, watching Dangerous Liasons over at my friend Laura’s house, and her dad walked in right in the middle of a sex scene. HORRIFYING.

So I thought I would break the list up by type of movie, like, family viewing versus classic versus Adults Only, but some fit into more than one category, like say The Wizard of Oz, and then I almost threw my hands up in despair due to my complete lack of focus and inability to whip my list into submission. GACK.

But I promised you a list, at least to get the conversation going, so here’s what I came up with. Side note: if you see something on this list you’re interested in showing to your kids, but aren’t sure if it is appropriate for their age level, I recommend checking Common Sense Media – they have an excellent ranking system, I absolutely trust their age suggestions, and they also give a great overview of discussion points that might arise from viewing so you can be prepared.

Family Viewing – The Must-Watch List

A Christmas Story
Annie
Beauty and the Beast (Disney animated version)
Babe
Back to the Future
E.T. The Extra Terrestrial
Ferris Bueller’s Day Off (maybe when they are a wee bit older)
Ghostbusters
Home Alone
How To Train Your Dragon (a modern classic, highly recommended)
The Karate Kid (we watched this together on Family Day, after the wax-on-wax-off reference came up during our trip to Disney somehow. Now everyone around here is doing crane kicks. Hi-ya!)
The Lion King
Mary Poppins
The Muppet Movie (and I would also recommend the new one, The Muppets – it’s perfect)
Pee-Wee’s Big Adventure
The Princess Bride (our kids hate this movie. We will be forcing them to watch it over and over in A Clockwork Orange type fashion until they LOVE IT, DAMMIT)
Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs
Spirited Away (CONFESSION: I have never seen this one, or any others from the same makers like Howl’s Moving Castle or Ponyo. I SUCK. Will get on that promptly.)
The Sound of Music
Star Wars
Tangled (I know, it’s recent – but already my most favourite Disney movie evah, so it’s in)
Toy Story
Toy Story 2 (actually much less scary than the original Toy Story, I recommend this movie as a first full-feature length for young kids)
WALL-E
White Christmas
Who Framed Roger Rabbit? (again, maybe for a slightly older crowd)
The Wizard of Oz

Family Viewing – Entertainment for Your Dollar (this will be my ongoing Family Movie Night list)

Every other Pixar Movie: Finding Nemo, Monsters Inc., A Bug’s Life, The Incredibles, Ratatouille, Up, Cars, Toy Story 3 (if you can take the sadness)

Most every other Disney animated movie: Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty, The Little Mermaid, Aladdin, Tarzan, Mulan, Pocahontas, The Princess and the Frog, Alice in Wonderland, Peter Pan, Fantasia, Tinker Bell, Phineas and Ferb Movie, Winnie the Pooh (the new one is so cute), Robin Hood, The AristoCats (a favourite of Little Miss Sunshine), 101 Dalmatians, The Jungle Book, Lady and the Tramp

Alvin and the Chipmunks (ANNOYING. Yet my kids ADORE.)
Big
Bedknobs and Broomsticks
Beetlejuice
Benji
Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure
Bolt
Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (I actually prefer the Johnny Depp version, I KNOW, sacrilege!)
Chicken Run
Chitty Chitty Bang Bang
Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs
Cool Runnings
Curious George (love, love, love this movie – highly recommended for your 2-4 year old)
Despicable Me
Enchanted
Escape to Witch Mountain
Fantastic Mr. Fox (God, how I LOVE this movie)
Flushed Away
Fly Away Home
Free Willy
The Goonies
Happy Feet (about a cute dancing penguin – gave all three of my kids nightmares, we had to turn it off due to their shrieking in horror. WHAT UP?)
Harry Potter movies (I guess, although I want them to read the books first)
Herbie The Love Bug
High School Musical (I KNOW. Yet I love them. I am ashamed.)
Honey I Shrunk the Kids
Homeward Bound
Hugo
The Iron Giant (maaaaaaybe…I shy away from films where I am going to cry like my dog died)
James and the Giant Peach
Jumanji
Kung Fu Panda
Liar Liar
Madagascar
The Mighty Ducks
Miracle on 34th Street
Men in Black
Monsters vs. Aliens
Mrs. Doubtfire
National Velvet
The Neverending Story (but first! assure your kids that THE HORSE WILL BE OKAY)
Night at the Museum
The Nightmare Before Christmas
The Parent Trap (old version or new version, both are good)
Piglet’s Big Movie
Pirates of the Carribean series
Puss in Boots
The Shaggy Dog (the original)
Shrek (I guess, although this series really bugs me)
Sneakers
Spider-Man
Spy Kids (really, this series is just awful, awful, awful, but my kids ADORE it, go figure)
Superman (the Christopher Reeve ones)
Swiss Family Robinson
Transformers
Tron
Wallace and Gromit
What a Girl Wants (not a good movie, but on our list for sentimental reasons)

The Classics We Can Watch Together When They Are a Little Older

Alien
Aliens
All About Eve
Annie Hall
Apollo 13
Arsenic and Old Lace
Batman Begins
Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid
Casablanca
Casino Royale
Charade
Citizen Kane
Die Hard
Donnie Darko
Easter Parade (my all-time favourite movie musical)
Fargo
A Few Good Men
Gentlemen Prefer Blondes (my favourite Marilyn Monroe film)
The Godfather parts I and II
Gone With the Wind
The Good, The Bad, and the Ugly
Grease (actually not one of my favourites, but it’s so famous it’s a must-watch)
The Great Escape (one of Sir Monkeypants’ favourites)
Groundhog Day
How to Marry a Millionaire (my sisters and I watched this about 1000 times as teens)
High Noon
It’s a Wonderful Life
Jaws
Jurassic Park
King Kong (the original 1933 version, if such a thing can be acquired)
Lagaan
The Lord of the Rings (Discuss: is it a requirement to read the books first?)
The Matrix
The Magnificent Seven (LOVE this movie)
Memento (looking forward to seeing their MINDS BLOWN)
Moulin Rouge
North by Northwest
Ocean’s Eleven
The Philadelphia Story
Rear Window
Raiders of the Lost Ark
Rebel Without a Cause
Rocky
Roman Holiday
Say Anything
Saving Private Ryan (oh hell, and every other Speilberg film ever)
Some Like It Hot
Star Trek (the J.J. Adams one – not because I think it’s the best, but because it introduces all the characters)
The Sixth Sense
The Terminator (hm…does have a sex scene, may have to move to the Awkward category)
Titanic
Top Hat
The Usual Suspects (another of Sir Monkeypants’ all-time favourites)
West Side Story
The Wrath of Khan
X-Men

The Classics I Will Recommend They Watch Then Politely Find Something Else To Do

Apocalypse Now
Dirty Dancing
Fight Club
Ghost
Goodfellas
Love Actually
Pulp Fiction
Psycho (only because I can’t survive watching it again)
Scream (ditto)
The Silence of the Lambs (I am seriously weak-stomached)
Top Gun
When Harry Met Sally

So it turns out that my root canal appointment this week was actually just a consultation, where I paid $150 for an endodontist to poke my tooth with a frozen Q-tip and confirm that That Really Hurts.

We all agreed that a root canal was in order, but they couldn’t book me in until March 29. I was rather concerned about this because it meant six more weeks of continuous pain medication, after already taking Tylenol or Advil (or, I shamefully admit here, some of each) on a regular 4-hour schedule for three weeks. It was as if the groundhog saw his shadow and decided to spend the rest of his hibernation at the pharmacy.

I rarely take any kind of medication so all these pills going in me are having a noticeable effect. I’m simultaneously exhausted and wired, so I’m too tired to do anything, yet unable to sleep. I’m constantly worried that my insides are bleeding out and that I’ll have to go through some terrible withdrawal when it’s all over. When the four-hour mark rolls around, I feel it in my tooth, but also my head starts aching and I feel nauseous. I am jonesing for my fix – not good.

So I called over there yesterday and begged them to see me earlier, before I have to start knocking over drugstores to support my habit:

Me (banana creating gun-like tenting in my pocket): Give me Tylenol AND Advil! And throw in that packet of cough drops!
Pharmacist: Sure, that will be $12.97.
Me: Oh. Okay. Here you go.

Thankfully they had had a cancellation and could get me in for this coming Thursday afternoon, where hopefully they will make things better. Because when you have half your head frozen and spend an hour and a half with your mouth open so they can drill out all four roots of your tooth, what can possibly go wrong? After that, Tylenol withdrawal will surely be a breeze!

That’s just step one in the Root Canal process, though. They put in a temporary filling, and weeks later you have to come back to have it replaced. The temp filling tastes and smells like cloves and it’s squishy when you chew and generally gross. I’m looking forward to an Easter dinner of pudding and applesauce.

And then a while after getting the permanent filling, you have to have a crown put on, for a total cost of around $2000.

Still, I guuuuuuess it’s better than having a plumber come over to pull it out. Although…it sure would cost a lot less. And be faster. Six of one?