And To Think I Used to Dream Of Being a Famous Actress

Dear Angelina Jolie;

You must have some kind of powerful inner strength just to get out of bed in the morning. Every time I am at the grocery store, I see a picture of you or your kids or your life partner on the cover of some magazine. One week it’s all, “We love her!” and the next week it’s all, “She’s a fake!” One week it’s, “Angelina loves all the children of the world!” and the next it’s, “But she feeds them Cheetos and that makes her EVIL!”

How do you do it?

Sure, I know you’ve got those impossibly cute kids and a mansion ten times the size of my house. You’ve got nannies and a chef and millions of dollars. You’ve got sex appeal and a killer wardrobe and a handsome-if-childish life partner. You’ve got film work for fun, and humanitarian work for self-esteem.

But Jesus, I cannot imagine what my life would be like if I had to worry about someone watching my mothering skills every single second of every single day. Sometimes I lose it, and I snap at the kids. Sometimes I am tired so I let them have cereal for dinner. Sometimes I’m not quite done my blog post for the day so I let them watch an extra episode of Caillou.

Sure, sometimes I take them to the park or play games with them or help them with their homework. But you’d never see that on the cover of a magazine, if I were famous. No, they’d only be interested in publishing that one time, ONE TIME, I spun around too quickly and knocked Little Miss Sunshine over with my backpack. ONE TIME, people.

And heaven forbid my husband come home late one night, or casually say hi to another woman at a party, or go on a work trip. No breaks from routine in any way! ANY WAY! Otherwise, it’s certain doom for your marriage. How do you learn to ignore those kind of rumours? How do you stop your mind from letting in even the tiniest, weeniest, sliver of doubt?

My life as a mother and wife could not possibly handle that degree of scrutiny.

No matter how much money or fame or beauty I had.

You can keep your life — I’m happy over here.

(But if you have any hand-me-downs for me or the kids, I’d be happy to accept them.)

All the best,

9 thoughts on “And To Think I Used to Dream Of Being a Famous Actress

  1. There was a time many years ago when I realized I don’t want to be famous, and I don’t want to win the lottery. Really. My life is pretty much fine as it is. Getting the stink-eye from one old lady at the grocery store because my kid is being less than meek and mild is more scrutiny than I can take, I couldn’t imagine dozens of people following me around with cameras. Just, ugh.

  2. That totally made me laugh in the middle of a busy day! Thank you. And yes, I can’t imagine being followed

    One of the best quotes about that was an interview a Montreal woman who married into the British royal family did. When her mother learned who she was dating she asked her daughter “What did you get yourself into?”

  3. haha, i am tortured sometimes with that decision to let the kids watch an extra show! (gawd, i should be reading or playing a game with them, but the silence is divine!)
    angelina seems to take it all in stride though, no? can’t say i’d want my husband to grow a scraggly goatee like brad’s though.

  4. Gem

    I agree, i often look at the lives of celebs as do the rest of the world, and wonder. What if ?. Its something that appeals to us on many different levels, the money, the style, the husband, the kids, the peace keeping work, well maybe that last one doesn’t appeal to everyone. However with all of that comes the responsibility, to seem normal all the time, to look after your kids, to play your role in the great game of life. What would we all think if Angelina one day said “Im not going to be doing my peace keeping bit any more, because i have a family to look after” I would say, about time Angie!, many would say, selfish, you can’t back out once you have accepted that responsibility.

    I think that Lynn has hit the nail on the head however, in that many of us admire the lives those people have, and im sure many of us would like to give it a test drive, but really, how many of us could honestly put up with it ??

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