I’ve been talking a big game about not trying to think too far into the future, and I guess I’ve been doing that, but at the same time, I was mentally preparing in the background for this to go on for a long time. Possibly a long, long time.
But just yesterday, it seemed like everything was suddenly turning around. Quebec announced that its public schools would go back mid-May, and that some businesses would be allowed to open. Now everyone is looking to Ontario – who have already announced a shutdown of all schools and businesses through to May 31 – to lighten up, already.
It’s really hard to say if this is a good thing or a bad thing or what. I guess time will tell.
But the very idea that my kids might go back to school sometime before the end of this school year was really shocking. I was just totally in the mode where I figured we’d be running with this routine until July, at least, and probably all summer. I wrote to my aunt yesterday and talked about how all our summer plans were cancelled and how there wouldn’t be any concerts or plays or museum visits or trips out for ice cream, but that I was okay with that.
But now maybe I don’t have to be? And we can maybe do stuff? With other people?
I have to say, this whole event has been a ROLLER COASTER of emotion. I can’t even figure out how I feel about the news that we might be turning a corner. Am I happy about it? Sad? Nervous? Scared?
People, I just don’t know. Probably all of the above.
One thing is clear though: I was extremely buried in the trenches, fully into the whole idea of hunkering down for The Long Winter, and was totally unprepared with any kind of emergence plan. I doubt we will rush to return to regular life, so now I’m faced with a zillion new decisions and rules to decide about and boundaries to set.
Okay, here is one thing I definitely do feel: overwhelmed. It’s very tempting to stick my head back in the sand and declare us to be a 21st century Wilder family, planning to live alone and isolated in the Big Woods forever and ever. It feels like the easiest decision right now.
Why can’t everything just be easy? SIGH.