I just realized that today is Thursday, my unbreakable, never-changing, laundry day, and yet I am not doing the laundry.
This is so typical of the past three weeks that I am going to sigh about it and then eat at least three cookies, and not spend even one additional second wondering when I am going to get around to it. If you are a local friend of mine, and you drop by and I’m wearing a yellow neon sweatshirt and dark green silk pajama pants with rainbow toe-socks, you’ll know why.
So far 2020 has been weird and unsettled and off-kilter. Through a strange convergence in the force, all of my kids’ regular doctors appointments fell into early January this year. So in the past two weeks I’ve been to see the allergist, the eye doctor, the braces guy, and the dentist, with all three kids, at various times and days.
Plus, both of my older two kids have had some additional health issues. Nothing life-threatening for either one, but for both, several additional doctors appointments and tests and scans and specialists, and it’s been busy and stressful. Every morning I look at the calendar and try to make sense of the day, and usually that is not possible, so I just try to make sense of the next HOUR, and get through that.
On top of that, it seems like every time I turn around, something new is breaking around here. My husband has a list of emergency, must-do repairs that is a mile long, and every day I add about three more things to it. We are still fighting The Mice Situation in the kitchen, for example. The other day we finally sat down at about ten at night to watch a show, and there was a sudden loud snapping sound from the kitchen. It’s both the best sound ever and the worst sound ever.
Our furnace died on Christmas Day (of course, when else would your furnace die in a time such as this?) and we had to have an emergency one installed a couple of days later. Here I will digress a bit and say that this whole incident was very, very unusual for me (I mean, aside from the fact of having to do an emergency furnace replacement, which is not exactly a daily event) in that I accepted help.
I am not, in general, a help-accepter. But we were supposed to go out of town on Boxing Day to visit our parents, and because my husband’s parents have also been quite ill and one of them was actually in the hospital (that’s a whole other post), we felt we could not cancel. So when I posted a whiny post on Facebook and one of my fabulous friends, RheostaticsFan, offered to come over and babysit space heaters in our house for a day, we gratefully accepted. And when my superhero sister, FameThrowa, offered to come over on the 27th for the entire day while the new furnace was installed, we also said yes. They were amazing and we owe them so much and I’m so grateful, and I am also pretty proud of myself for growing as a human being there, because it’s definitely my nature to say no thank you and just try to do it all myself.
Anyway, as part of getting the new furnace we signed up for this government program where if you get a new furnace AND you do one other environmentally-friendly thing to your house, you can get a rebate. But now the clock is ticking for us to do one other environmentally-friendly thing to the house, which we are finding is going to take time, and effort, and money, all of which we are short on at the moment, due to doctors’ visits and hospital visits and parental care issues and an unexpected new furnace.
So it’s all kind of a jumble of life at the moment, trying to decide what gets your attention and funds, and what does not. It’s really a minute-by-minute survival thing right now.
Way back in late December, before all this madness, Sir Monkeypants asked me if I had any resolutions for the new year. I am not big on resolutions in general but one thing I do like is to pick a “word of the year” that will help guide me. I don’t always do it, but in years when I have, I have liked it. So I gave it a lot of thought this year, but I couldn’t come up with anything. Does this mean I am directionless? Listless? Confused?
Possibly all those things, and January is not helping. But do have a spark of hope that it is not too late for 2020, that I can still pull it together and find My Word and get focused and make it all happen. I’ll let you know if I get there.