The Captain, the Little Miss, and I are sitting on the floor of her room. She’s accidentally dumped her suitcase of Rainbow Loom rubber bands and we’re sorting them.
Me: Oh, here’s some more of those lime green ones. I didn’t think there were so many of those.
The Captain: There ARE, because there is a huge pile right HERE.
The Little Miss: I already KNEW that, because they are MY rainbow bands, and I KNOW them.
Captain: Did not.
Little Miss: Did too.
Captain: Did not.
Little Miss: Did too.
Me: Cut it out! God, you two are just like oil and water.
Little Miss: What does that mean?
Me: It means you don’t mix.
Captain: Dibs on oil.
Little Miss: That’s just because you HATE WATER.
Captain: EVERYONE hates water.
Little Miss: I LIKE WATER.
Captain: You are the only one!
Little Miss: No, Mom likes water too!
Captain: She does not!
Little Miss: Does too!
Captain: Does not!
Little Miss: Does too!
Kids: MOM!!!
Me: SIGH.
Fin.
TurtleHead 
OH MY GOODNESS that sounds like my children and that makes me feel so much better. Day one of four day weekend, today my kids were making “raspberry lemonade” together. 7.5 is stirring. 6 wants a turn stirring. 7.5: But I’m better than you at stirring. 6: I’m good at stirring as well. 7.5: But I’m BETTER. 6: No you’re not. 7.5: I am actually. 6: Actually you’re not that great at it.
Just one tiny sample of stupid, stupid, stupid.
The “dibs on oil” especially got me, as lately around here everything is “I call…” I call the blue plate, I call the round cookie, I call the Lego guy with the blue hair… OY.
Oooooooh. “I call oil” – what does that mean? That’s so funny. Thanks for the laugh.
LOVE this. Children the world over, mothers the world over, from the beginning of time…