I thought this was a pretty weak week on Dance Show. It highlighted for me a problem with the all-stars format, and that’s that the all-stars are WAY better than the new contestants. It’s nothing against this season’s dancers — everyone always sucks in the first three weeks. It’s just that they aren’t given a fair chance to develop before being thrown to the wolves. In almost every single number, the all-star totally outshone the competitor, and that kind of sucks.

In fact, the only number where I thought the newcomer and all-star were evenly matched was Pasha and Cristina’s Paso Doble. LOVED IT. And of course, she went home. AMERICA FAIL.

And apropos of nothing, didn’t Cat ROCK that black leather dress with the zipper on the results show? Mind blowing.

Anyway. Let’s have a look at who’s still standing, shall we?

1. Kent. I seriously underestimated the love for Kent that is out there in my rankings last week. He’s super popular. And I have to admit, I thought he was amazing this week. The judges were hard on him, but I actually bought him in his number with Courtney, and he came the closest (I thought) to actually being a fair match for his all-star (other than Cristina). I like Tyce when he’s doing jazz instead of Broadway, and this was my favourite number of the week.

2. Alex. Alex had a rough time this week with kiss-of-death Broadway, which does not bode well. I kind of expected him to be fabulous at everything. Still, he obviously has the fan base to be able to push through at least a couple of bad performances, so he’s still up near the top. On a side note, I think this was the first time that I ever enjoyed a performance by Lauren. I really dislike her, but she totally rocked the Broadway.

3. Adechike. I was surprised last week at the number of commenters who don’t like Adechike. I think he’s a sweetie. He lucked out by pulling Allison as his partner this week — a good style match for him and also, Allison is quickly becoming the Gold Standard All Star. Their number was beautiful and I loved it and I like Adechike and SO THERE.

4. Lauren. I know! Huge leap forward! She was like a different person this week. She got totally out-danced by Dominic but you could still see her talent, and most importantly, she managed to sell a character. I was as happy as Shankman! If she continues to improve like this, she’ll do amazing — showing growth in a continuous story arc is the key to getting votes on this show.

5. Billy. Okay, I really think the judges were totally unfair to Billy this week. I think they had prepared little quips in advance (witness: “It’s not Billy B. Buck, it’s Billy B. Whack”), and felt like they’d be gypped if the didn’t get to use them. Billy surprised and impressed me. I’m not saying he was good, but he wasn’t terrible. He knew going in that this was not a good style for him, and yet, he was fully committed, stayed in character, and seemed comfortable enough that he wasn’t constantly looking at Comfort to know what to do (unlike, say, Jose, who basically watched Kathryn the whole time). He was as krump as he could be, and maybe even more so. So I was impressed. I think Billy is awesome in his own style, has charmed the audience, and shows potential for that all-important growth. So I can’t count him out just yet. Also, this news just in: Comfort KICKS ASS.

6. Robert. Big surprise for me that he ended up in the bottom three. Of course, he was paired with Anya, who is quickly becoming the Kiss Of Death All Star. She’s just too good and too sexy and too grown-up to be properly led around by the little bitty baby boys they have on the show this season. Heavens, I giggle just imaginging Billy or Jose trying to handle her. GAH. Robert did his best and tried hard, but I barely watched him, I was so drawn to Anya. When I did glance his way, he just could not measure up. I still think he’s great, and with one ballroom number under his belt hopefully he’ll move on to something impressive next week and move back up the ladder. Still can’t imagine him hip-hopping, though.

7. Jose. Dear Lord, Jose was terrible this week. Sir Monkeypants pointed out that this was actually a good style pull for him, because it’s all about high energy, and the judges aren’t able to criticize based on things like toes pointed the wrong way or poor extension or whatever. So the fact that Jose couldn’t even sell us on Bollywood means…not good things. If he ends up in the bottom three next week, he’ll be out for sure, so he better hope America REALLY loves that smile.

8. Ashley. Nigel was so right this week when he pointed out that Travis’ “jazz” routine was too close to being contemporary to showcase anything else Ashley might have to offer. I felt like this number, while interesting and original, was too packed with stuff — it was like, do this move, strike this pose, do this lift, move over here, now jump. Very robotic and sequential and again, I felt nothing from Ashley, although she seemed to be trying. She seems to have a solid fan base but I really, really feel she belongs in the bottom three this week. HEAR ME, AMERICA.

9. Melinda. If only we could marry Ashley’s technical skill with Melinda’s maturity, we’d have our winner. As it is, Melinda’s technique is not good, and it shows. The judges fawned all over her this week for her contemporary routine, but I found her stiff and tentative, and SO outclassed by Ade that it was almost embarrassing. I even think Ashley would have done a better job with this routine, which is not a good thing. We’ll see how she does next week, but she’s clearly destined for the bottom three again, and probably deserves to go home (wow, bottom three of Melinda, Ashley and Jose…who do you pick? Discuss.)

Who do you think are the dream newcomer/all star pairings? I’m starting to think that they stacked the deck last week by matching up each newcomer with their best possible match. For example, I think Alex could not do better than Allison; Jose clearly cannot do better than Comfort. It made for a great show last week but for several dancers, there’s no where to go now but downhill. What do you think?

My ideal pairings are:
Kent – Courtney or maybe Lauren
Alex – Allison or Kathryn
Adechike – Kathryn or Allison
Lauren – Twitch or Neil
Billy – Courtney or Comfort
Robert – Courtney or Allison
Jose – Comfort
Ashley – Mark or Neil
Melinda – Neil (for Broadway style numbers, not contemporary) or Dominic (I know this seems weird. But I really feel that Dom could draw some emotion out of Melinda. I’d love to see them do a head-to-head type hip-hop/jazz battle)

Do you think they will ever let the newcomers dance together? Maybe in the finale or something? I would love to see Lauren dance with Kent, Billy, or Adechike; Ashley dance with Alex or Robert; and Melinda dance with Robert or Kent.

And now I have three kids who are very, very tired of watching their mom type about Dance Show, so I have to dance off now.