So, How Did It Go?

The wedding was…good. I think. I’m torn.

I mean, there’s no question that the kids were great. We were very proud of all three of them. No meltdowns, not too crazy or wild, and they all ate (some) dinner. In general they were charming, played well with the other kids that were there, and had a really, really good time.

The down side to bringing your kids to a wedding is that you spend the whole evening chasing around after them, and thus you don’t get any time to socialize as adults. There were 10 of us there from my university class — fifteen years now since we graduated — and it was so good to see everyone. Sir Monkeypants’ old roommate had come from England (with his two-year-old and four-month-old daughters, and as I said to Mrs. Carl Sagan, some people are made of stronger stuff than I). Another of our friends was there from Paris; several others were there from Toronto or Waterloo.

So needless to say, these are not people we see very often and we can’t exactly call them up whenever we feel like it to pop out for a coffee. And yet I was only able to talk to each of them for maybe two minutes a piece, and our conversations went like this:

Me: So, how is work going? CAPTAIN, NO HITTING.
Friend: Oh, it’s okay, I’m thinking of moving away from hi-tech and into flower arranging.
Me: Really? Why’s that? GAL SMILEY, IT IS THE OTHER GIRL’S TURN NOW.
Friend: I just love flowers so much.
Me: That’s great, I have to run. LITTLE MISS, GIVE THE BABY HER BINKY BACK!

And so on. I mean, it wasn’t only us. Everyone had brought their kids and I think the oldest was seven, so obviously we were all doing a lot of running around chasing tots and sorting out disagreements and kissing owies better. Since all the other kids were there, I know I would have really regretted it if we had not brought our own, and it was so great to see our kids forming instant bonds with our friends’ kids. They all really did have a great time.

Oh, as a side bonus, we got seated with some friends of the groom who have two daughters, age 11 and 9. Their 11 year old in particular was so fantastic with the kids. At our table she helped them with their dinner and made art projects for them and then later let them all chase her around the dance floor endlessly. We are SO hiring her for babysitting when she turns 12.

And, I totally adored my Etsy earrings.

So all that stuff was great. I just feel like I really missed out on seeing my own friends. Sir Monkeypants pointed out afterwards that we didn’t even get to see each other; our entire conversation for the evening was long the lines of, “I’m taking this one to the bathroom, you have the other two!” and “Did she drink her milk? Does he want any juice? Can you get some extra napkins from the waiter?” and so on.

We left at around 9:30 just as the dancing was starting, because Gal Smiley in particular was crashing and asked to go home. I’m sure it was the right choice, but Sir Monkeypants never did get his special daughter dance. Little Miss Sunshine danced all through dinner, though (to the “over dinner hour” quiet background music), and that was worth seeing. SO CUTE.

I’m happy we took the kids. I’d make the same choice again. But going to a wedding with children in tow is definitely a very different experience than what I’m used to.

7 thoughts on “So, How Did It Go?

  1. we’ve got two weddings coming up and both welcome kids. Max is not coming. So rarely do we get to have a night out with each other and spend some time with friends. And then there is the having to leave before the dancing. The main reaosn why I got to weddings is the dancing! Well, I guess there are a couple of other reasons, but it’s up there on the list. For one of the weddings, I know my other friends are not bring their kids. For the one in October, it seems to be undecided. And it’s in TO, which would mean that I would have to leave the party early and go back tot he hotel room with Max. Not exactly a good time. I think he would have more fun going trick-or-treating with his Nana (yep, Halloween wedding!).

    Glad to hear that it went so well though. Sounds like the kids had a great time.

  2. I’m torn on the bringing the kids thing. On the one hand, I think Hana especially would have fun at a wedding. On the other hand, I really love a chance to get out to a wedding and party and dance. We get so few opportunities to do stuff like that.

    Last summer we went to a wedding and both of us were in the wedding party. We left the kids at home because I felt it was important for our focus to be on bride and groom. Can’t be distracted by kids when the expensive photographer guy is trying to take group photos.

    At our own wedding we invited kids. On the one hand it was fun to have lots of little ones running about looking so cute in their fancy dresses. On the other hand, but 10:30 a large portion of our friends had left the party because their kids were tuckered. It was a bit of a bummer to see the party empty out so fast. Partly this is because we were among last of our friends to marry so almost everyone had kids.

  3. I haven’t been to a wedding in so long (at least since M was born 4 years ago). So I am not sure what we would do. I guess it depends on who is getting married.

  4. Last wedding the Boy was 5 and we tagged team. (We were staying at the hotel the reception was held in.) My sister gets a sitter. (The kids can come to the ceremony and maybe dinner but they have someone who can put the kids to bed when they get tired.)

  5. SirMonkeyPants

    One friend of ours, who was at the wedding, mentioned that they hired a couple of baby sitters for their own wedding last year. Not for their own kids, but for the kids of all their guests.

    If you wanted to keep them with you, you could do that. If you wanted to leave them with the sitters upstairs in the hotel room they had for them, you could do that too. If you wanted to go up and check on them you could. If they needed to go to sleep, then there was a place for them to do that.

    I missed some of the details in the conversation, I had to check on a juice cup or break up a fight — I don’t remember exactly, so I’m not clear on all of the logistics. But I think that was a pretty awesome idea.

  6. we offered that at our wedding and one of the ones we are going to is offering the same thing. no one ended up bringing kids to our wedding so I don;t know if it works or not.

  7. Going out with kids is never simple. The wedding sounds like it was an extended version of a restaurant dinner. The trying to eat and talk while making sure the kids are eating and not doing any damage. Really, I am now a big fan of take out. 🙂
    Good for you for going. I bet you have some great pictures!

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