My kids made some very nice pumpkins this year (unicorn, panda, barfing man) and I could show you a picture, but instead I will include this picture from the CBC’s Facebook page, because it is the best pumpkin ever:
Am I right or am I right? So totally doing that next year.
It’s Halloween, and I enjoy Halloween. I like handing out the candy at the door and seeing the kids. We usually get hundreds of kids here, but this year is very cold and wet and rainy so I don’t know what to expect. I’d complain, but the last several years have been gloriously clear and warm, so we seem due. And if we have tons of candy leftover, so be it, right? I’d love to be able to be all, “oh heavens, what will we do with the leftover candy?” but even I can’t pull that off with a straight face, as we all know it will be going straight into my belly.
This year is the first year that Captain Jelly Belly, at age 14, won’t be going out door to door. We have put a firm foot down about it – Grade 9 is our cutoff. He’s a little pouty about it, to tell the truth, but he negotiated that, in exchange, he be allowed to watch a bona fide horror film, something he’s been asking about for a few months now. He’s a pretty good negotiator and I’m tired of putting him off so I’ve said yes.
And now, what to choose? Personally I am not a horror fan. I want him to be scared but not too too scared. The Saw movies, for example, are still right out. And I don’t feel he’s quite ready for say, Quentin Tarantino. But I don’t want his first horror to be something stupidly cartoonish, either, like Bride of Chucky or Sleepaway Camp, which I watched at a Grade 8 sleepover party in my youth and left me scarred forever with both its murders and its terrible, terrible acting and dialog. I mean, they can’t all be Citizen Kane, but at least put in a half-assed effort, am I right?
Anyway, I recommended Scream to him, which I think is a very fine film, but Sir Monkeypants things perhaps he won’t get all the cool meta moments having never seen the basic version. We tried to get a copy of the classic Friday the Thirteenth or Halloween, but they are nowhere to be found, and I did find a pack of all six? seven? Nightmare on Elm Street DVDs at Walmart but I have no desire at all to own seven Nightmare movies at a cost of $50.
So we have borrowed a few things from my sister, including The Thing, a movie that’s not quite horror but is TOTES AWESOME and has some great jump scares, and I have a copy of the crappy remake of Poltergeist from a couple of years ago that might fly. I’m sure we can rent something suitable on iTunes as well. Hopefully he survives it – I think he will, he’s pretty chill about such things. He’ll be watching alone, though, as his father will be taking the girls out. I wonder, if while I am handing out candy at the door, I will hear a small voice on the couch in the main room asking me to please come sit beside me NO REASON.
Happy Halloween, everyone!