Gal Smiley has a hobby: dropping food on her pants.

(I can only assume that it’s an active pursuit, as there’s no other way to explain the volume of food that ends up in her lap at every meal.)

A few months ago, Sir Monkeypants started teasing her that she needed to invent, and start wearing, Bread Pants. Pants, made out of bread. Then, when she dropped ketchup/salad dressing/milk in her lap, she could just rip off a piece of her pants and eat it, like a fancy hors d’oeuvre.

I mentioned this idea to my mom, and I suggested that if she was ever out and saw fabric with bread on it, she should pick some up and either she or I would make some PJ pants for Gal Smiley out of the bread fabric. I have to admit, I did not think that there would be much availability of bread fabric in the world.

But my mom found some.

This is bread fabric. Not only did my mom find it in the fabric store where my niece works, but they didn’t have enough to make a pair of pants left on the bolt.

So my lovely, dedicated mother made a special trip to the other branch of the store, one city over, to get enough bread fabric, and they had just barely enough.

So now Gal Smiley has Actual Bread Pants, and they are the most hilarious thing ever, and she adores them and wears them pretty much at all times when she does not have to leave the house. I’m sure she would wear them to school if we allowed it.

But I am left with lingering questions, like, who thought making bread fabric was a good idea? And why is there so much apparent demand for the bread fabric? And what projects are people doing with the bread fabric, if they are not making Bread Pants?

It’s a crafting mystery.