So apparently I was not clear in my post of yesterday: we will not be getting a cat, ever ever EVER. My allergies make it an easy decision, but in general Sir Monkeypants and I are not pet people, not interested in animals, not adding one to our household. EVER.
I have exactly one houseplant and it’s always at death’s door because I only remember to water it about once every six months, and in the 13 years I have had this one plant I have given it extra soil once. I think it only clings to life to spite me – or else it is related to the dandelions in our yard that cannot be killed by anything short of the Hand Of God, and God is busy these days with other things.
As for pets, we once had fish for a period of about two years, and they were a HUGE thorn in my side, what with the PAIN and HORROR of having to clean the tank out once every six weeks. Not to mention the incredible HARDSHIP of having to feed them once a day. Way too much dedication for the likes of us, and I did a little jig of joy when the last one finally died and we could put the tank away in the basement.
Also, we may have gone away for a week or more at a time without feeding them. But trust me, they were as stubborn as my one crappy houseplant, and the lack of food only seemed to make them more determined to hang on. Stupid fish.
And, the one household chore I hate more than all others is vacuuming, so if it were an animal with fur, or an animal that throws wood chips out of its pen, or an animal that tosses empty sunflower seed shells out of its cage, then it wouldn’t be too long before we were all living in abject filth. The day I find a cat hair in my dinner is the day before the day we have cat for dinner. You get the picture?
I mean, it’s really a wonder that our three children are fed and clothed in a half-decent manner, and I think we can all agree that it’s best to not push our luck in that area, mm-hm?
So yes, no cat for us. When I said yesterday, “What now?”, I meant more of a, “How do we convince Little Miss Sunshine that we are never getting a cat, even if she thinks she has us on a technicality,” rather than a, “I guess that’s it – we’re adopting!” kind of thing.
Do you think I can sell her on a nice stuffed cat for her birthday? It’s almost the same thing…no?