Pass Me That Bottle Of Peroxide

One time I saw this movie called The Green Mile. In it, Michael Clarke Duncan plays a simple kind of guy called John Coffey.

When he introduces himself in the movie, he always says, “John Coffey, like the drink, only with a ‘y’.”

And the whole movie long I was like, “Cough-y? What the heck kind of drink is that? Something you take when you are sick? I don’t get it.”

By the third time he’d introduced himself this way, I was quite miffed, like, “I do not know this cough-y. Is this some sort of crazy down south thing? Why did they make this supposedly simple-minded character refer to some obscure drink that no one has heard of? THAT IS STUPID.”

By the fifth time he’d used the phrase, I was totally fed up, like, “WHY DOESN’T HE JUST SAY JOHN COUGHY LIKE WHEN YOU ARE SICK AND HAVE TO COUGH? THERE IS NO DRINK CALLED COUGHY!”

Then, like three years later, I was having a coffee one morning and suddenly I GOT IT.

Sometimes I can be very, very stupid.

5 thoughts on “Pass Me That Bottle Of Peroxide

  1. CapnPlanet


    This vaguely reminds me of a smilar epiphany I had just a year or two ago. In 1975 I was just getting into music when Paul McCartney & Wings’ song “Listen to What the Man Said” came out. There’s one line that goes “Soldier boy, kisses girl”, and I could never figure out why Paul pronounced the word “girl” in that line as “girl…T”, with a T at the end.

    Fast forward oh, 30+ years, as I’m listening to this song when it comes up on rotation in my kids’ music folder. Suddenly I realized, it’s not a “T”, it’s a little kissing sound. Duh….

  2. A while back I was reading something when I came across a word I word I didn’t recognize: gridiron I asked Ed, “Gri-da-RON? What the hell’s a gri-da-RON?!?’

    After he stopped laughing, he managed to sputter out, “Grid, Iron”

    I’d heard the word lots of times…I just hadn’t ever seen it spelled out before (obviously I don’t read about football much).

    Ed will NEVER let me live it down.

  3. Nicola

    That’s a riot. Reminds me of a ‘battle of lyrics’ I had with my husband, who insisted that in Adam & the Ants ‘Young Parisians’, the line says: ‘Young Parisians are so French, they love patting cement.’

    I’m all: what in the name of ARSE are you talking about? French people don’t PAT CEMENT. Nobody pats cement. You can’t be right. He was all: whatever.

    Later that day I listened to the track (and I urge you to, as well, just so you will see the enormous hilarity of what I’m about to tell you) only to discover that the actual lyric is:

    ‘Young Parisians are so French, they love PATTI SMITH.’

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