I didn’t get to make my usual Monday blog post this week because I was TRAPPED IN HELL.

That is to say, I had to go to the post office.

This is actually the first year that we won’t be seeing our families at all over the holidays — we’ve stayed in Ottawa just once before, and that year, all of Sir Monkeypants’ family came up for a visit. I’m looking forward to the quiet time and the family time, but the presents thing is kind of a hassle. I did all the shopping for my own family back in October and took their gifts down with us at Thanksgiving, but Sir Monkeypants is one of those looney types who only thinks about Christmas in December, like, how can he possibly deal with the pressure of finding the absolute most perfect gift for everyone in his family that shows how much we value them and care for them, if he is only going think about it for three weeks out of the year? Sheesh.

So we finally got around to getting some stuff for them this past weekend (with more to be purchased online and shipped directly, SOON, ), and I had to mail it. Monday morning I took all the stuff and put it in the car, loose, because we didn’t have a box that was the right size to fit it all. After I dropped Gal Smiley at school, instead of rushing home so the Wee One could have her nap, I made a “quick stop” at the post office.

First of all, they were out of the right size of box, so I had to buy a bigger one for $3 more. Then I wrote the address on and everything, but found out they couldn’t mail it without me taping it shut. And a roll of tape, at the post office? Is SIX DOLLARS.

AS IF.

So I said screw that, I am going home to get tape. But first, I had to get in the long, long line to pay for the box, which I had already written on.

And while we waited behind like, 10 people, the credit card machine ran out of paper, and the lady behind the desk had to call to see someone somewhere to see what kind of paper it took. That took 10 minutes. Then the machine was finally fixed, and the lady behind the desk had to spend a further 10 minutes explaining to the lady doing shopping that although they are the Post Office, they were completely out of stamps. ALL STAMPS. The hell?

And do I even need to mention the fact that the Wee One was crying this whole time, because she needed to nap? No, I do not.

So finally we get up to the front and I plonk down my six dollars for a freakin’ box, and race home, just in time to get CJB off of the school bus. While at home I taped the box shut, and managed to mail it this morning at the post office (which STILL has NO stamps, like, do you understand what business you are in?) with bitterness but no further incidents.

I’d still be bitter, but yesterday the kids’ Letters From Santa came in the mail, so I’m trying to forgive and forget. Canada Post apparently holds the world record for “Answering Letters To Santa,” which is further evidence that there are way, way too many world record categories. Captain Jelly Belly and Gal Smiley sent in their letters a couple of weeks ago and received responses — form letters with their name hand-written in, and a little two line personal note at the bottom.

It’s actually really nice — the letters are long and talk about elves working hard and reindeer planning parties and everyone eating cookies and candies, la-dee-dah. I was all impressed, although the kids couldn’t really care less. They didn’t even have the patience to wait around to hear me read the entire letter to them, although granted, the Doodlebops were on at the time, and how can mere text compete with the technicolour glory that is Doodlebops?

In any case, they were relieved to hear that Santa did, in fact, get their letter, and he will, in fact, be bringing them stuff.

In the meantime, I guess this means we’re even, CANADA POST. Just don’t screw up again. Happy holidays!