Speaking of the Olympics, Sir Monkeypants and I spent a large chunk of the drive talking about how the equestrian events and the sailing events shouldn’t even qualify as Olympic sports.

I think there are far too many Olympic events in the first place — the fact that Michael Phelps can be the best in the world at the 100M this and the 200M that and whatever says to me that these events are not different enough to actually warrant being different events, know what I mean? When someone at the track wins two or three medals, that’s a big deal, but it doesn’t seem to be very unusual at all to be the best at several swimming events. I should look back and see when was the last time that someone different took the gold in the 100M and 200M freestyle and 100M and 200M butterfly. I’m guessing it doesn’t happen very often that four different people take these four events.

But at least I can buy that swimming itself is a sport — the equestrian and sailing stuff seems to be pushing it. If Ian Millar can compete for Canada in horse jumping at the age of SIXTY-ONE, then not a sport, no way, no how!

And if sailing can be a sport…why not car racing? And if car racing, why not stuff that is actually directly physical, like “sport dance” (that is, ballroom dancing) or maybe double dutch skipping?

And why do they hand out medals for things like fencing and skeet shooting and archery and handball, but yet golf is not in the Olympics?

It’s all very shady. Time to do a little weeding at the Olympics, I think.