Dear LiveJournal…

We have to talk. I think it’s time I moved on.

We’ve had some great times, you and I. I still love my layout and I love my friends page. You’ve been good to me, but I don’t want to get into that too much because I promised myself I wouldn’t cry.

The thing is, I don’t like the way you handle comments. Not everyone who reads my blog wants to create an LJ userid and log in to leave me a message. I want other people to be able to leave me links to their blogs, so I can go and read them. And you just aren’t meeting my needs in this area.

So I’ve decided. It’s for sure. I need to find a new home.

But we’ll always be friends. I’ll be back for commenting. I hope things won’t be awkward between us.

I’ll be moving out as soon as I find a new place.

Love,
TurtleHead

Dear WordPress…

You’re cute and you have a nice package. I like the fact that I can import my old LJ posts. I like the fact that I could buy my own URL someday and have it redirect to you. I like the fact that I can create stand alone pages to go with my blog, like an “about” page and an “I love turtles!” page. I think you’ve been responsive to my flirting and we could really click.

But sadly, you won’t let me have TurtleHead as a blog name, even though no one currently has that blog name — someone is just using “turtlehead” as their log-in name, so you’ve reserved it. And you don’t allow dashes or underscores or anything, so I can’t even have Turtle-Head or Turtle_Head or anything like that.

I am annoyed.

I’m going to take your offer of a second date under consideration.

Love,
TurtleHead17

Dear Blogger…

Seems like everyone is partying over at your place and I could really pick up some swinging cool buddies over there. But again, you won’t let me have TurtleHead, even though it is owned by some guy who made ONE test post, back in two thousand and THREE. Which SUCKS.

Plus, you want to tie my blog to my gmail account, which means I either have to publish and reveal the gmail account that is my own first and last name — meaning my mother will find this blog — or I have to use my SnowBelly account, which is troublesome because when I log in as SnowBelly I can no longer view my Google calendar in a different tab, which I update about 20 times a day, so I’ll constantly be logging out and logging in and hell, if I wanted to log in all the time I may as well stay with LJ.

So I’m thinking it over, but don’t wait up for me.

Love,
SnowBelly

Dear TypePad…

Why oh why would I spend $150, US, per year to have a blog, when I can have one for free on several other sites?

What’s that? You say I could have…TurtleHead?

Interesting. Let’s meet for coffee.

Love,
TurtleHead