I’m getting so fed up with toilet training the Gal. She wears underwear and pees in the potty all day long, but when it comes to pooping time, she asks for a pullup.
Some days I feel resigned and I just hand one over.
Other days I feel frustrated and I yell at her for a while and she freaks out for a while and then we call a truce, and I hand one over.
The really annoying thing is that she has pooped in the potty several times before, and yet, past poops do not seem to help her feel more comfortable or confident at all. With the Captain, once we broke the poo barrier, so to speak, that was it, he was a pooper. With the Gal, it’s one step forward, one step back. (Just watch what you’re stepping in.)
Today was so typical. This morning she asked for a pullup because she had to poop. I was busy with the Wee One and asked her if she would please, please, just try to put her poo in the potty this one time. Of course, she had a total meltdown and by the time I was done with the baby and ready to make nice, she told me that she was over it, not pooping, it was all gone, and never pooping again, thank you!
All day long I fretted about what the stored-up poop was doing to her system, and I offered her a pullup many times but was met with refusals.
Then at dinnertime, while I’m busy cooking in the kitchen, she casually strolls into the bathroom and poops in the potty. Which is sooooo incredibly aggravating, because why can’t it be that easy every time? Why can’t she just go ahead and be a potty pooper now? Why does this poop in no way indicate whether or not she’ll feel up to getting on the toilet next time? WHY WHY WHY?
About a half hour after the big poop — which was rewarded with lots of praise and a KinderSurprise — she comes over and tells me there’s more poo, so could she have a pullup please?
It’s like the whole potty part of her day never happened. Maybe she’s like that guy in Memento that could only remember things for like, 10 minutes after they happened.
More likely, she is a typical stubborn three-year-old. But I swear, if I live through this, there’s a KinderSurprise with my name on it!
TurtleHead 
That’s a rough situation. But isn’t the moral of this story that if you don’t give her a pull up she’ll eventually use the potty? Can’t you just hold the line and say (nicely but firmly) no more pull ups, from now on this is it? Mommy doesn’t get pulls ups and neither do you?
I guess it’s coming down to that, and we should just get it over with. I think we were both just hoping it would be a smoother transition than this! Also, we’ve heard horror stories about kids who were forced into toilet training before they were ready — apparently kids can hold their poop (how that is possible, I do not know) and that can lead to all sorts of other infections and health problems. So we’re a little paranoid about her refusal to poop at all, which is why we always cave with the pullup.
Really I think I just need to de-stress in general. An evening with my Buffy DVDs should do the trick!