We’ve started to think about Christmas presents for our kids, and we’re finding that maintaining the Santa mythology is quite the delicate dance.
For months now, Captain Jelly Belly has been rhyming off the things he wants from Santa. His friend has a new car? “I’m going to ask for that from Santa!” He sees a racetrack on TV? “I’m going to ask for that from Santa!” Lately we’ve had a lot of talks about how Santa has limited room on his sleigh, and he can only bring one thing for the Captain. Why? Because Santa has to bring presents for all the boys and girls in the world, so he can’t fill his whole sleigh with stuff for the Captain.
CJB always walks away with a frown on his face, like he can tell he’s being had, but he just can’t quite see how.
Anyway, once I put the “one item” rule in place, CJB decided he wanted his one thing to be Arthur. Arthur is one of the Thomas the Tank Engine trains. CJB has about 25 Thomas trains, and he only plays with them sporadically now. Plus, he already has Arthur, only in the small metal version, and now he wants him in the big wooden version.
Needless to say, we will not be getting him an Arthur for Christmas.
So this brings up a problem. I want him to have the joy of the whole Santa thing. But he is exactly the type who, if Santa does not bring him the very thing he asked for, will a) be hysterical and b) will never trust Santa again.
Yesterday I went to the Superstore and purchased his actual Santa gift — a Lightning McQueen racetrack, in the shape of Mack, the big 18-wheeler who is Lightning’s transport. Excellent long-term play value, plus on mega-sale, plus the Superstore had a deal where if you spend a certain amount you save an additional $30, so overall, I basically got it for free. That justified the early shopping, which I swore I would not do this year, but did I mention basically free?
Now our job is to make him think that this item is what he really wants for Christmas, before we go see Santa next week (although, if CJB will actually bring himself to talk to the weird stranger, I’ll be shocked).
Yesterday afternoon CJB was playing with his Lightning McQueen so I offered to play with him. Then I said, “Wow, wouldn’t it be SO COOL if only we had a Mack?” And he said, “Yeah!” And I said, “I know! We could totally ask Santa for that to be your one thing! Then we could play Mack and Lightning together!” And he said, “YEAH! I want a Mack from Santa!”
I hope it’s not wrong to manipulate your kids like this. Now all I have to do is convince Gal Smiley she’d like a Little Tikes kitchen from Santa and we’re all set.
Then it’s on to the talk about Jesus. I think that one might be a little tougher.
TurtleHead 
Oh yes, right there with you. Zack wants Santa to bring him a Wii, but they are becoming hard to find. I refuse to get up early or stand in line or fight anyone for it, so we’re trying to convince Zack that what he really wants is for Santa to bring him a Nintendo DS.
My parents never led me to believe Santa was real – I always knew where the presents were coming from. I think I’ll be doing the same thing for my children – the whole belief in Santa thing becomes a messy situation as far as I can see.
Good luck with the Captain though – I know I’d prefer the Lightning McQueen racetrack. 🙂
Speaking of Cars, I was in Toys R Us the other day and they had a massive section just devoted to Cars toys, even though the movie came out almost two years ago… kudos to the Disney/Pixar marketing team, to say the least.
Yes, it’s manipulation but one could argue that the whole myth of Santa Claus is mired in deception (as are the Tooth Fairy and the Easter Bunny). But it’s all in fun.
I never believed in Santa, but most people I know who did still have very fond memories of the experience. They don’t seem to care that it was make-believe.
Totally nothing wrong with steering your kids in a direction that will fit their wishes to the gifts they’re getting. Really it’s for their benefit.
Good luck! I think the secret is to oooh and aaaah over it in the weekend flyers a whole lot :).
We were in Toys R Us last weekend (with crazy, crazy crowds…Christmas comes earlier every year!) and I saw that big Cars section. Actually we were really happy about it — the Captain loves that movie and it isn’t always easy to get associated merchandise. It’s the same thing with Buzz Lightyear — he loves him, and thankfully, you can still get the action figures at Toys R Us or the Disney store. Since kids keep discovering the movie for the first time, there’s always a demand for the stuff, I guess.
I don’t think it’s so much that manipulating your kids is wrong, just that it’s so EASY. If you do it too much your skills at manipulating adults will start to slip.
The best justification that I ever heard was that letting kids believe in thinks like Santa and the Easter Bunny as kids makes it easier to believe in the big lies like Truth, and Justice as adults.
Completely tangential to the post, but I just wanted to say that I was struck with admiration for the following paragraph:
CJB always walks away with a frown on his face, like he can tell he’s being had, but he just can’t quite see how.
To me it paints a crystal clear picture in just a few words — brilliant!
Having said that, I totally agree with the gist of the other replies about manipulating your kids. ‘Managing expectations’ is an invaluable (not to mention time-honored) skill for parents.
We haven’t reached the point where we have to explain Santa or other mythical characters to Mr Excitement, but I’m sure we’ll be there next Xmas. We haven’t thought about it much, but I’ve long felt that truth and transparency are good guiding principles for parenting. (Disclaimer: I haven’t had the chance to put this into practice, so it’s quite possible that this is a hopelessly naive POV.) I’d prefer not to let our kids believe in magic, of any sort.