Last night was the dress rehearsal for The Big Show — the recital at the end of the year for the dance school I attend. I’ll be performing in one 2-minute number with the other gals in my adult tap class. We have sparkly costumes and everything!

The rehearsal did not go well for me at all. First of all it took me forever to find the place, and then forever to find parking, so by the time I got inside I had 30 seconds to get my shoes on and get onstage. Then, during the number, my hair band fell out, and I missed a spin move while trying to catch the hair band, so I ended up facing the wrong way, and then I was totally confused and basically missed the last quarter of the routine. I’m right at the centre front of the stage so it was like, “Hello everyone! See me mess up in my sparkly costume!” Gack.

Then afterwards I sat on a step to take off my shoes and I sat in some chocolate, which is now all over the bum of my sparkly pants.

Thank God that the DVD they are making of the real performance costs $48. Now I have a real excuse for not buying one to show to my friends and family. Gack! If I survive the real show (which is on Sunday afternoon) I’ll definitely be going for a good stiff drink afterwards. In fact I think I’ll have put the gin on ice just in case, for when I get home.