I just heard on the radio that an “elderly” man died in a house fire on the weekend. It got me thinking, at what age do newscasters start to call someone “elderly”? 65? 75? 85? I wonder if they have some sort of official guidelines, like, ages 18-24 counts as “young man” and ages 25-65 counts as “man” and 65+ pops you into the elderly category. Maybe some sort of infirmary is required to qualify — a 60-year-old that is confined to the house and uses a walker gets classified as “elderly” but an 80-year-old who his spry and goes sailing every weekend is just a man. Hm.

You know, if you say “elderly” over and over to yourself enough times, it loses all meaning.